


A Breach of Galactic Protocol

by Turquoisephoenix



Category: Ratchet & Clank
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Childhood Friends, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Fusing the two universes together, Hurt/Comfort, Lawrence accidentally becomes Dr. Nefarious's wingman, Lawrence doesn't have time for this, Mild Rewrite of Elaris's Backstory to Fit The Games, Romance, copious use of high school pet names, mild robot gore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:22:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 26,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25832725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Turquoisephoenix/pseuds/Turquoisephoenix
Summary: After his defeat in A Crack in Time, Dr. Nefarious is in need of serious repairs and Lawrence, in a fit of desperation, hires the one person that is willing the break intergalactic law in order to fix the most hated robot in the universe. Unfortunately for him, Lawrence might've accidentally rekindled an old flame in the process. Dr. Nefarious/Elaris. Gameverse.
Relationships: Elaris/Dr. Nefarious
Comments: 21
Kudos: 32





	1. Making An Offer She Can't Refuse

**Author's Note:**

> This was co-written by @pastelpopsicles on Twitter. She wrote the first draft, I tightened it up and wrote over it. Takes place after A Crack in Time and is the result of a Discord chat where we were both like "hey maybe Elaris is the one that fixes up the loser bot aha how cute would that be".
> 
> Quick side-note, since this is taking place in the Game universe and not the Reboot universe, none of the events of "What's A Little Galaxy-Wide Destruction Between Friends?" are canon to this story. In this universe, Elaris learned that Dr. Nefarious was a robot when he attacked Metropolis on planet Kerwan with his swarm of robot bugs.

**A Breach of Galactic Protocol**

* * *

It was a beautiful miracle of science, how Lawrence managed to teleport an unconscious Dr. Nefarious mere moments before he was tossed into an exploding space station that would've ripped his very atoms asunder and spread him like a thin space dust across three neighboring planets. The butler was used to saving his boss' life at the last second on numerous occasions but this...

This was too close of a call.

"Must you keep picking fights with the Lombax, sir? Might I suggest making an enemy that isn't so heavily armed next time." Lawrence quipped.

Dr. Nefarious, one eye missing from his socket and his jaw hanging loose from his head, remained silent. Static noises dimly played from his glass dome as his body remained draped limply in the backseat of the tiny escape pod, various unsightly fluids lightly dripping to the floor. He looked like a bad Halloween prop that was subjected to at least five different acts of vandalism from bored teenagers.

"Ah, I see. Forgot about the boss battle you had earlier. Silly me."

As he slowly floated around in space in a cramped escape pod with a charred, malfunctioning robot, Lawrence - for the fiftieth time that day - questioned his life decisions and deeply analyzed what lead him to this point.

Maybe he should have pursued his career as a first class bassist somewhere deep in the Solana Galaxy. Perhaps being a butler for one of the ruthless capitalist stockholders of Megacorp was less stressful on the ol' circuits if he still wanted that evil thrill in his life. Better time spent there than in his current predicament, that's for sure.

"Why do I bother..." Lawrence mused out loud, mostly to clear the dead air.

Minutes stretched into hours as the two continued to hover endlessly through space. After growing tired - and slightly unnerved - of the eerie silence, Lawrence decided to keep himself company by turning on the radio. News reports of Dr. Nefarious's space station blowing up along with him echoed on each channel he switched to, even the music channels. Dr. Nefarious's greatest failure was absolutely inescapable.

Lawrence, it seemed, was trapped in his own personal version of Hell. The universe was playing a cruel joke on him. He shook his head discontentedly, hoping to send the universe a sternly worded metaphorical letter with this gesture, and once again peaked to the back seat where Dr. Nefarious lay motionless.

As he stared at the lifeless heap of bolts and metal, Lawrence found it odd how much he wanted Dr. Nefarious to suddenly get up and start loudly complaining about being bored or to scream about why his left arm was ripped from his shoulder. But with the static still playing from his mechanical nightmare of a brain, Lawrence wondered if he was too late on the last minute rescue and if he was keeping company with a broken, metallic corpse.

"Time to start looking for another job then..." Lawrence spoke out loud in a mock chipper tone.

Nefarious didn't answer.

* * *

A few days have passed with nothing but the emptiness of space, the quiet hum of an unconscious robot, and a static-y radio playing news reports, My Blaster Runs Hot commercials, and outdated jazz.

A lesser, more undignified man would've been driven _mad_ under these conditions, but Lawrence weathered on with a stiff upper lip. Turns out Ratchet and Clank managed to save the galaxy (again, not at all surprising to the butler considering the current hell that was being inflicted on him) and time was slowly fixing itself.

He never dared ask - not that his boss would give him a satisfactory answer - but why did Dr. Nefarious ever think that using a mythical time machine would yield any positive results? The best it would do is rip the universe apart and kill them all.

As he pondered at the thought, a beeping sound came from the pod's dashboard, a bright red light flashing "LOW FUEL".

 _Oh dear_ , he thought to himself as the pod became flooded with crimson. This is the end of the great butler Lawrence and his idiotic sidekick Dr. Nefarious! The stories of their failures will be told alongside campfires and water coolers for years to come!

He scanned the area for any planets or lost ships, coming up with nothing. Almost ready to give into his fate of dying in space, that's when he noticed an outpost on a nearby hunk of what seemed to be a blown up moon, just barely bigger than the asteroid that still haunted his memory banks. He took this tiny window of opportunity - _carpe diem_ as his college chums would say - and made quite a landing, crashing into the moon fragments as the fuel finally depleted.

The pod was completely trashed. It was repairable, but without anything to get it off the ground, it was as useless as the lifeless robot in the backseat. Dusting himself off from the crash landing and adjusting his bow tie, he took the time to take in his bearings. It seems like someone - one of those scruffy, _undignified_ Vullards maybe - took up shop on this desolate moon and soon left when business wasn't up to par.

Lawrence dragged the doctor's body from the trashed escape pod, propped him up against a crate like a store dummy, and then started to comb the area for any supplies or means of contacting another life form. As he dug around the old chop shop ( _gingerly_ , of course, as the place was quite dusty and did not pass the white glove test), he could hear a faint sound coming from Dr. Nefarious.

Lawrence instantly poked his head out of the door with a quiet but almost desperate " _Yes_ , sir?", but alas, it was just a broadcast of an older episode of "Lance and Janice". He was displeased - at this point he'll take even the most inane griping from his boss - but at least it gave him something to listen to as he dug around some more.

_**"Oh Lance! I thought I'd never see you again! I thought you died in that horrible fight with that awful cybernetically-enhanced army of radioactive lizards!"** _

_**"Janice my love, the doctors managed to put me back together! Now I'm stronger and more handsome than before! I can carry you away with one arm!"** _

_**"Oh Lance!"** _

Lawrence could only stare in weary, silent resignation as the gross sound of two lovers sloppily making out filled the empty void of the chop shop. He'd try smacking the doctor like he usually did but feared that, in Dr. Nefarious's current state, even that small act of violence would cause him to completely fall to pieces. All he could do was sigh and continue on with digging and dusting. He even did some light rearranging and re-cataloging, in the off-chance that the original owner came back and decided to admire his handiwork. He found old rusted tools, magazines dating years in the past, and finally, something of importance - the communicator pieces of an old smart phone.

With the tools at his disposal and some rusted parts, Lawrence began working towards fixing his employer's gPhone, which was unfortunately still in his pocket while he was fighting Ratchet and Clank. With his current " _occupation_ ", Dr. Nefarious couldn't exactly take his phone to the nearest gPhone store in the event that he dropped it or threw it at a wall in an angry fit - which he did quite often - so one of Lawrence's many skills was how to fix the intricate little tool, keeping the poor maligned smartphone alive well past its normal lifespan. Taking pieces of their recently wrecked pod came in handy, and he didn't think his employer would mind too much.

As he worked tirelessly, he kept an ear open for the Lance and Janice broadcast. If the plan to fix the phone failed, the next option would be to use his boss's own radio signal as a way to lure in any unsuspecting ships. Ripping out his own boss's brains seemed needlessly cruel even for someone like Dr. Nefarious, but it was definitely an option.

_**"Janice, I'm now a weapon strong enough to surpass Getal Mear!"** _

_**"Oh Lance, but will that be enough to stop Marthas, the Witch King?"** _

_**"With you by my side, Janice, I fear nothing. Nothing but the end of your love."** _

After tightening a few bolts, the gPhone was fixed. Well, mostly. The thing still looked like it would fall apart at any minute and the screen was dreadfully cracked, but at least now it could be used to make a couple calls. He nonchalantly scanned through all of Dr. Nefarious's contacts. Finding someone who wasn't dead or wanted them dead quickly became a challenge. Cassie? Dead. Flint? Probably dead. Courtney Gears? Restraining order. Minionbot #2716? Wanted him dead since day one.

As he scrolled through the phone (and swiped away any alerts from his games that he still had a daily bonus active), a catalog of enemies and the dead at his fingertips, he found a name he had never heard of. He narrowed his eyes at the name near the bottom of the contact list.

 _Elaris._ Purple heart. Smiley Face. Purple Heart. Swirling Hearts.

Was this person an old friend or coworker of Dr. Nefarious's? They must be important, seeing as there were several heart emojis next to their contact name. Not even Cassiopeia received that privilege.

Whatever the case is, if he didn't try to contact them, he could be calling the chop shop his new forever home and, hundreds of years from now, some hapless space explorer would find their rusted remains and try to write them off as an archaeological curiosity.

* * *

_'A shooting star fell down to earth, Lightning cracked the sky...'_

It was late at night when Elaris's smartphone went off next to her head and woke her up.

She prayed that it would stop as she buried her head underneath her pillow but the cheesy song that she once loved as a college student kept playing, filling her room with crackling dulcet tones. Resigning herself to her fate, she ended up reaching for her nightstand, knocking over a couple Funko Pops in the process, only to find that it was coming from an unknown caller.

' _Wow, these scammers are getting **persistent** ,' _she thought to herself and she ignored the first call, but it kept ringing. The same unknown caller popped up on the screen, she kept on ignoring them until they disconnected, but then they'd come right back, letting the song repeat itself. Why would anyone want to be contacting her this late?

_'Something weird is happening, Something I can't deny...'_

It could be a time zone thing, she thought to herself. It's probably early afternoon at best for the caller. Still, she hesitated.

Looking down at her phone as it continued to ring, voicemail after voicemail began to pop up on the screen, flooding her notifications. Why were they so adamant on calling her? Did she miss a shift at work? Did she forget to pay for a parking ticket?

Now the calls seemed to worry her. What if there was an emergency?

' _The wind was like a hurricane, Storm clouds filled the sky..._ '

She couldn't take the song anymore and finally answered, mentally preparing herself to either apologize for any unpaid tickets or give some unlucky caller an earful if they were trying to scam her for the fourth time that week.

"Look, do you have any idea how late it is over here? This better be important or I will call the Polaris Defense Force on you!" she said, on the defensive, sleep slurring her words. Important or not, surely there was galactic protocol that could've let this wait until the morning?

"Oh, I'd rather you not do that, ma'am. My employer would be quite unhappy about it." There was a brief pause. "Well...as unhappy as he can be in his current state, that is."

Elaris froze in place, breath catching in her throat. The voice was extremely professional and had the even tone of the most astute gentleman, but something about the way he talked - carrying the same noble airs as either a member of the aristocracy or the mafia - made Elaris suddenly take this phone call extremely seriously.

"Uhh.. Excuse me?" she responded, her brain reeling.

"I do apologize for not giving a proper introduction. I am Lawrence, and I currently serve under the employ of Dr. Nefarious. Does that name ring a bell for you, ma'am?"

It did, and Elaris could feel her blood instantly turn to ice.

"Either way, I've called to ask a favor of you. I do hope you accept."

She numbly laid down in her bed, looking up at the ceiling with confusion and, of all things, anger. Her and Dr. Nefarious go way back, being the best of friends in high school and college before she moved to the Bogon galaxy to finish her robotics degree and he moved on to transform into a robot and become a terrible scourge of several galaxies.

Dr. Nefarious hadn't contacted her in _years_ , was one of the most renowned criminals in the universe, and now has the audacity to have _HIS_ butler call for a favor?

On top of that, she heard the news of his space station blowing to pieces only a few days ago. There was no way those two lived through an explosion that large. Was she dreaming? Was Lawrence trying to contact her from beyond the grave?

"Are you still there, ma'am?"

"I am. I'm just...shocked. Just give me a moment to process this."

"Completely understandable. Not everyone can say that they were contacted by The Great Dr. Nefarious and his loyal butler willingly."

"Is that what he's calling himself these days...?" Being woken up past midnight did not do wonders for Elaris's mood, especially now that she knew that there was a wanted criminal on the other line. The surreal nature of this phone call was bringing out her temper.

"Why do you need my help? I'm sure The Great Dr. Nefarious has better things to do on his evil genius agenda than bug random civilians with phone calls!"

Oh dear, Lawrence thought to himself as he still had the phone pressed to the side of his head. _She caught on._ But he can tell that she did have some interest in what he was offering. She wasn't hanging up for one. He cleared his throat and debriefed her on his situation.

"Well you see, ma'am, our station was blown up with Dr. Nefarious taking a nasty bit of damage. Left arm's fallen off, body is all burnt and bumped, you get the idea. Turns out Lombaxes can be quite temperamental creatures. I saw your name in his contacts with little purple hearts so I was thinking you'd be important."

What Lawrence didn't know was that he had used a magic word.

_**Important.** _

That word hung in the air and stirred up feelings that Elaris couldn't place names for.

For all of Elaris's life, she never felt like she was _important_. At school, and at all of her past jobs, she was always the little geeky thing that people made fun of behind her back, the little nerd that would take any bullying with a smile on her face, and usually the first one to suffer budget cuts in her department once she became a working adult.

Not once in her entire career path could she describe herself as " _important_ ". That word was reserved for other people. She even left it off her resumes and cover letters.

But apparently she was important to Dr. Nefarious.

She was important enough to keep her a secret from his evil minions and to keep her phone number handy in case of emergencies.

She contemplated as the butler spoke. She sat up again, alert.

"There will be a reward for you if you help us out in any way, ma'am." Lawrence continued, not sure what caused her sudden bout of silence. "Either it be dropping us off in the Corvus Sector somewhere or, not sure if you're qualified, actually repairing him."

So he really didn't know a thing about her, Elaris thought to herself. She was a top robotics engineer where she worked and invented quite a few gadgets and weapons in her life, some which became Gadgetron staples and household names. Not that she saw much of a cut in terms of royalties of course, not that anyone in the galaxy even knew who she was, since she never was an _important_ member of the team, but it was the thought that counts, right?

Still, this all felt so strange and unreal to her. She was desperate to wake up from this whole conversation and go back to living a life of drudgery and mild normality, but she could almost feel a cold and tired gaze from the other end. She stood up from her bed and looked into the darkness that engulfed her room as she tried to place all the pieces together into something that made sense.

Someone she knew who went rouge, tried to turn millions into robots, and almost tore time apart for some silly vendetta...still had her as a contact? Her, an organic life form, or how Dr. Nefarious would put it, a "squishy". She thought he hated all of them, including herself. She was pretty sure any plot that would wipe out all organic life would include her in it.

Hands began to shake. Should she really take the offer in the chance of seeing him again? Would he even remember her after so many years? Would he try to rekindle their old relationship? The phone still in her hand, she continued to contemplate the decision she would make, but then a sharp cough brought her back to reality.

"Still up for it, ma'am?"

"Yes," she finally said. She felt like the entire universe was bearing down on her shoulders as she dragged a hand across her face. "Just send me your coordinates and I'll be over. I promise I won't contact the authorities or anything. Just...trust me, okay?"

"Oh, excellent." he said. If he was happy about her response, he certainly didn't let it show in his voice, which remained calm and even. This was a man who would stare into the Void and the Void would be too embarrassed to stare back.

"But do be quick, seems like he's running on fumes." And with those words hanging in the air, the butler hung up.

As she numbly stared at the phone in her hands, her Underwatch background staring back at her, Elaris panicked a bit and began to pace back and forth in the darkness of her bedroom as her emotions instantly came crashing down on her, her brain screaming at every atom in her being.

' _I can't believe I just took this offer!!! Oh for the love of every intergalactic religion out there, are you an idiot, Elaris! What if the others find out I'm helping a super villain? What if I get caught? What if I'm killed?!'_

All these thoughts rushed through her mind and she clenched her jaw so hard to keep herself from screaming that her teeth began to hurt.

What kept her from ghosting Lawrence and just curling back in her bed and forgetting this entire thing happened was the last thing that was said in that strange conversation. Dr. Nefarious was _dying_ and he needed her help. Someone **_needed_** her. She needed to save someone's life. She didn't have a second to lose.

' _No need to panic, Elaris. Time to be a professional about breaking intergalactic law_.'

With the steely determination normally reserved for superheroes, Elaris immediately fixed herself up three cups worth of insta coffee, grabbed her coat, and rushed out of her apartment and towards her ship, keys in one hand and a thermos full of sweet, delicious caffeine in the other. Her landlord must have found it strange for her to bust out in nothing but pajama shorts, sneakers, and a bulky jacket but to be fair on Elaris, this also wasn't the first time this had happened. At least this time, she didn't have to deal with a building on fire or a loose plasma beast.

Inputting Lawrence's coordinates into her ship, she braced herself for what lay ahead.

"Dr. Nefarious, what have you gotten yourself into this time?" she muttered to herself as she shot off into the unknown.

* * *

She never was good with meet-ups or gatherings, especially with the guests being an old flame and his butler. The whole ride there was her trying to calm down and keep herself from having a heart attack. She was beginning to regret the many things in her life that brought her to this moment, but mostly, she regretted the insta coffee. Turned out the coffee was a horrible idea as it raced through her veins, messed up her stomach, and caused her anxiety to spike. But at least it kept her alert enough to pilot the ship.

' _There's nothing he can do to me, right?'_ her brain reasoned with her as her hands kept jittering against the steering wheel and her insides turned into molten lava. Lawrence said he's practically dead so he couldn't try to kill her.

But why would he kill her if he still had her as a contact? That's what bugged her the most. He had all those years to kill her or to try to convince her to turn to the Dark Side, but instead he chose to leave her alone. And why didn't Lawrence know a thing about her? You'd think he'd try to brag that he had a past girlfriend in Gadgetron to all of his evil minions.

Maybe, deep down, he still _cared_ enough about her that he wanted her far away from any of his evil schemes. As much as an insane robot scientist could, at least.

As she listened to the radio, a breaking news segment came on.

"There still have been no sightings of The Great Dr. Nefarious (Elaris quickly snorted) and his loyal butler Lawrence. They were last seen fleeing to the Corvus Sector in an escape pod and are, unfortunately, still presumed alive. Any tips will lead to a reward and a pizza party made in your honor, and, if found that you're holding information about his whereabouts, it will lead to a hefty fine, prison time, and wide public mockery. If this reporter could inject his own personal beliefs into this broadcast, we all hate this guy, and we all want him arrested, so please, for the sake of the universe, _TURN HIM IN!_ Anyways, back to your regular programming."

"Hahahaha... _great._ Just great..." Turning white at the newscaster's remark, she took another shot of her coffee. Her heart was starting to beat at a speed reserved for small dogs.

 _Why_ was she doing this? Why did she think this was a good idea? Then she will never start her dream company and instead get locked up with the likes of the Prog twins and Flint Vorselon. She didn't think she could last very long in prison. She was too delicate and prisons never had good wi-fi.

She found herself shaking, maybe from all the stress she was putting her sleep deprived body through or from being out in deep space in a pair of robot printed shorts. So many thoughts ran through her mind that she didn't notice Lawrence trying to hail her ship through a radio call. She wasn't sure if she should feel glad or even more scared that she finally found them.

Better get this done in one piece, she thought to herself. Now all she had to do was play it cool...

"Ma'am...are you alright?" Lawrence asked when Elaris, a tall purple woman dressed in pajamas, practically fell out of the driver seat onto the dusty ground.

"I'm fine! Just fine! Super!" Elaris barked back in too loud of a voice as she tried to pose nonchalantly against the side of her ship with a fake smile on her face. Lawrence gave her a withering gaze as he examined her like a speck of dirt, a thousand different scathing remarks swirling through his head at once. But then saw she was popping open the back of her ship, so he didn't bother asking too many questions and figured it was best to keep quiet.

Deciding that the less time she spent speaking meant the less time spent doing something illegal, she helped Lawrence drag the unconscious Dr. Nefarious and his parts in the back of her ship. Lance and Janice went on making out unheeded as she draped Nefarious's arm across her shoulder and Lawrence took hold of what was left of his legs.

Once they were inside, Elaris's reunion with Dr. Nefarious was very bittersweet. Despite everything, looking at him in that state - broken and practically lifeless - broke her heart. Gently, she reached over and touched his scarred face, letting her fingers follow the gashes made in his brow. She knew what he looked like now - you didn't try to turn a galaxy into robots without appearing in the news, after all - but this deep wound on his face was new.

She didn't really know how to react at that moment. Sadness at seeing her old friend in such a state? Fear that she'll be arrested or killed for helping him? Hopeful that maybe, she could repair him and things could go back to the ways they were before he snapped and went robotic?

Despite knowing it was wrong to feel such a way for such a diabolical monster, she settled for pity.

She must have been staring at him for a while, for Lawrence ended up looking over at her and briskly tapped her on the shoulder, clearing his throat in a quick "a-hmm" noise. He opened his mouth to say something more but had a large plastic tarp, normally used to protect sports vehicles from the weather, shoved into his arms.

"Here. I know it may be humiliating, but hide as best as you can and cover both you and him -" she pointed at Nefarious with a thumb. "-with this. I'll dim the lights back there so you'll be in complete darkness." She paused and started scratching her arms nervously. "You know, if that's alright..." she said, hesitant at how this whole thing was supposed to go.

"I'd prefer this over a death in the cold vacuum of space, ma'am." Lawrence responded curtly.

"Okay. That's uh...good..." she stood in place, gritting her teeth, hurriedly thinking of a plan. "I have a workshop on Kalebo III. I have Gadgetron clearance and a history of randomly showing up in the middle of the night to work on projects so no one's going to find anything suspicious. It's a good place to hide out while I repair Nefarious. I have...NO idea how I'm going to cover this up with the Defense Force but I'll think of something! I promise!"

Lawrence had absolutely no complaints - or, rather, he wasn't saying them out loud - and it wasn't long before her ship took off, with the coordinates taking them to Kalebo III.

With the ship set to autopilot, despite all the coffee running through her system, she allowed herself to get some sleep, resting her head on the nearby window.

' _I'm going to wake up and none of this ever happened. This is just some weird dream and I can happily go back to work and finish up that new weapon I was blueprinting,_ ' was the thought burning through her head as she drifted off into a dreamless void.

* * *

Sadly, a couple hours later, she found that it was real and that she was definitely still committing grandiose transgressions. She woke up shivering and had her gaze be met with a depressed looking butler.

Letting herself stretch and yawn, she looked over at the map on her dashboard. Oh, _great_. They weren't even halfway there. Why couldn't committing crimes be _faster_? Sighing to herself as she sunk deeper into her seat, the butler behind her chimed in with some small talk.

"So ma'am, I've been meaning to ask this, and forgive me for prying into your personal life when I am so very grateful for this large favor you're paying us...but _how_ did you ever come across Dr. Nefarious?"

Sitting up, she turned to face him, exhaustion in her eyes. She wasn't sure if now would be the best time to dive into their old friendship. But, seeing as they had a long ways to go, she immediately decided why not. What's the worst that could happen?

"I went to the same high school and college as him. Weird, right? We were pretty good friends and we invented a lot of things during lunch breaks. A claw to break into vending machines, a gun that would turn anyone into sheep...you name it, we built it!" she said, flashing another smile, one that was actually genuine and full of warmth.

The smile didn't last.

"As the years went on," she said, nervously fidgeting with her headset, "I noticed him getting more and more bitter. It didn't help that Qwark was constantly bullying him and shoving him into lockers every other day. I thought things would get better once we went to college, but instead things...got worse. Because our college happened to have a great superhero program."

She exhaled through clenched teeth.

"Our bullies multiplied in number and followed us."

Lawrence was in awe over this, even if his expression never changed. He could never picture Dr. Nefarious having any friends or being social with _anyone_. Lawrence figured that Nefarious's unlikable personality was present in his early years as well. How could someone like Elaris ever show empathy towards him?

"I ended up getting this amazing scholarship at a university in the Bogon Galaxy. I remember telling Nefarious about it and he seemed quite…unhappy about it, to say the least. I knew he was excited for me finishing my robotics degree, but I guess he didn't want me to leave him behind with Qwark. I left the next day without even saying goodbye and the next thing I hear from him is how he created a race of green blobs in a secret laboratory in the swamps of Rilgar. ..."

Outwardly, Lawrence showed no emotion. _Inwardly_ , he winced.

"Honestly, it's been eating at me ever since. Sometimes I wonder if, in some way, I could've prevented..."

She stopped herself, letting her words hang in the air. You couldn't change the past. There was no way to change the past. "...I'm sure he still hates me for not keeping in contact for so long."

"Oh, I doubt that." Lawrence finally said.

"What makes you say that?" she retorted, now feeling thoroughly sorry for both herself and the unconscious monster in the backseat.

"How else did I contact you, ma'am? He even put little hearts next to your name in his phone. He's not known to do that even with his past relationships. I get the feeling he's always been planning to call you back but never could muster up the courage to do so."

Somewhere deep inside Elaris's heart, the ancient remnants of old, unrequited feelings began to stir, like the subtle tremor that came before an ancient kaiju attacked a city.

"I say when he wakes up from his repairs, we ask him how he feels."

For the first time since meeting him, Elaris could hear a bit of an emotion sneak into Lawrence's voice. There was a tiny bit of playfulness at his words when he said 'ask him how he feels', like he was delighted by the notion of teasing his boss.

"I don't know..." She said, looking away. She started nervously scratching the back of her neck. "Maybe he forgot to delete it when everything went down? I'm surprised he never told you who I am. I know he likes to dwell a lot on his past but, you know, him hating on the 'squishies' probably refers to me as well..."

"I can't speak for him but you seem important enough to keep hidden from his evil affairs." he replied.

There was the magic word again. **Important.** Nefarious thought she was important.

Why did that matter _so much_ to her?

"We can pester him about it when he's fully repaired. Deal?" Lawrence said, extending a metaphorical olive branch.

They both looked over at him, covered in an old blanket with a faint hum of a polka song playing. She still felt a bit of regret wash over her body, but she couldn't turn back now even if she wanted to. Even though she was fearful of what he'd say to her when he woke, she still had a hopeful feeling that he might still remember her or still _care_ for her. She gripped the steering wheel of the ship and nodded.

" _...deal._ "

End of Chapter 1.


	2. Just a Mild Act of Resurrection

Chapter 2

* * *

Her map pinged, stating that they were near their destination at long last. Kalebo III quickly changed from a small blue-green orb hanging in the sky into an atmosphere that engulfed her ship. The towering, pristine buildings of Gadgetron Headquarters sprang into view. An ocean of beautiful, sharkigator infested waters sparkled underneath them. Excited, she informed Lawrence and prepared for a landing. Both were just as eager as the other to get out and get some fresh air, away from the polka music and the occasional Lance and Janice reruns that kept constantly playing in the back seat.

"Oh goody." Lawrence said as he eyed the Gadgetron buildings underneath them. Gadgetron meant high-paid security guards and the police. Gadgetron meant allies of _Ratchet and Clank._ "I hope we don't get arrested."

"Trust me, we're fine!" Elaris said in a bubbly voice, trying to convince both Lawrence and herself. "My workshop is just outside the headquarters. They learned I could be a little wild after that incident with the Pyrociter so they gave me a space away from important buildings and people. Y'know...just in case I ended up blowing myself up!"

Lawrence looked at her with barely disguised contempt, stunned into silence. What did his boss ever see in her? Was this a prank from beyond the grave?

"I was planning on coming by this week to work on some things so they won't find it suspicious that I randomly showed up in my pajamas! I show up to work in my pajamas alllll the time!" Elaris continued, ignoring Lawrence's pointed gaze.

"Hauling out two fugitive robots isn't very suspicious?"

"HQ's seen weirder!" She joked. While she still had a giant, customer service smile plastered on her face, in her mind she was still picturing the lengthy prison sentence if she got caught. When her cutting wit didn't get a response from the robotic butler, she shrugged and finally docked her ship inside the workshop, thankful that she didn't have to go out in public in her current attire.

Once outside the ship, she helped Lawrence haul Dr. Nefarious to a nearby work table. He barely fit. Limbs dangled. From his glass dome, Janice screamed and zombies groaned.

"Lawrence, grab the rest of his parts from the ship." she said as she pushed another workshop table in their direction. She gave Dr. Nefarious a little shove and he rolled over onto both tables, mouth agape as he stared into the heavens with one loose eye. "I'll get the lights up and running and we can start on a diagnostic scan."

As her workshop - her home away from home - sprang to life around her, Elaris put on her most determined game face and cracked both of her knuckles.

"Let's bring this supervillain back from the dead."

* * *

So, here she was. She was back in her old workplace, but for reasons she'd never expect. Laying in front of her was the charred up, broken heap of metal that was Dr. Nefarious. The revenge-seeking inventor of the Bio-Obliterator. Robotic liberator of the Solana Galaxy.

Her best friend and maybe secret boyfriend in her college years.

She decided to change into her work uniform - a grey, functional, but slightly bulky little number that was flame-resistant, shock-resistant, and random explosion-resistant- while Lawrence prepared the rest of Nefarious on the clunky workbench. As she changed in another room and neatly folded her pajamas, she could hear Lawrence trying to rearrange his employer into a shape that resembled a person more than a pile of garbage.

Elaris still had no idea how to feel about this whole situation. The looming fear of being arrested by the Galactic Rangers was fighting against the hopefulness of seeing her old friend alive again. She was positive that, if she got caught, telling them "It was my first offense!" wouldn't fly if her first offense involved helping the man who once tried to destroy the fabric of reality itself, but at the same time, she couldn't bring herself to just _abandon_ him. She'll get him up and running, let him escape off into the night with his butler, and, who knows, maybe a miracle will happen and he'll decide that committing crimes is wrong.

Whatever the outcome, it was going to take a lot of blood, sweat, and tears to get there. But Elaris was determined. She put on some light gloves, stretched out her fingers, and ran the diagnostics. Running a scan proved he was still "alive" in a way, and she breathed an immediate sight of relief. Brain function was still there - that little spark of life that made him Dr. Nefarious was still swirling about in his glass dome head of his - but his torso and left arm took the most damage.

The harrowing part was the fact that her scanners were showing her internal parts that resembled the organ system of a living, breathing creature rather than the robots she was used to working on. Elaris assumed that his chest contained as many wacky gizmos as his weird fish bowl for a head, but no. That would make _sense_. Instead he had lungs, a heart, wires in the same formation as a nervous system, and even a stomach and a skeletal system. Robots typically didn't have organs like an organic. It just wasn't an efficient design.

" _Okaaaaay..."_ Elaris sucked in a breath through her teeth. She nibbled on her thumbnail. "-first I'll say the good news." she said as she stared at a robot skeleton that housed robot organs underneath a robot skin. "He's still alive, he just needs to be put back together."

"Odd definition of the term 'good news', but I guess this means we didn't waste a trip." Lawrence said automatically.

"The bad news is...repairing him will be like surgery. But on a robot, I guess!"

Lawrence began tapping a finger against his chin.

"Have you ever done surgery before?"

"Nope! We're screwed!"

But by hell, she was going to try anyway. She managed to pry open his chest plate and was greeted by a mess of cables and wires wrapped around mechanical ribs. A tear ran down her face. Frustration tried to get the best of her but she pushed through it. Pulling out pieces of metal and sharp objects from his chest like a twisted piñata, she slowly but gradually cleared a way to his power source.

Robotic power sources, the heart of the robot that held the spark of electricity that kept them running, she could fix. _Actual_ hearts? No.

What she was holding in her hand was _both_ , and that worried her.

It was as if someone built a metal sculpture of an organic heart for an art project, ran a bunch of wires through it, and made the clockwork monstrosity pulse like a real heart. It fluttered against her hands weakly. Deadly shards of glass, metal, and space debris stabbed it in many different areas like a voodoo doll, causing it to slowly weep coolant into her hands, but still it thumped.

 _This_ was the first part of him that needed fixing.

"Hold on, Nef..."

* * *

Hours seemed to roll by as she studied his "heart" underneath surgical magnification glasses and carefully picked away pieces of glass and rock, slowly pulling them out one by one with a pair of tweezers and laying them down flat on a metal plate. She'd then patch up the holes with a specialized (and unfortunately very expensive) metal nanotech that could synthesize the same type of metal his heart was made out of down to a molecular level. She was unmaking his wounds, rewinding the clock until his heart was brand new. His heart responded to her repairs and began to flutter more strongly.

After roughly putting him back together, first by gently sticking his heart back in his body and then by gently shoving the rest of his internal organs back in his eviscerated chest like a really bad game of Operation, Elaris hoped that giving his whole system a jump start might reactivate him. Once all the pieces had been set in a way that he looked less like a gutted corpse and more like himself, she hooked him up to an external battery and hit the switch.

The crackle of electricity filled the entire room. Ozone stung her nostrils.

Bracing herself, Elaris hid under the workbench, waiting for the worst.

But nothing _happened_.

She flipped the switch again, another loud burst of electricity filled the room, and still nothing.

Seconds ticked by. Fingers curled up in a fist, Elaris was about to scream in frustration when she heard a loud gasp of air and an immediate, sharp "LAWRENCE! WHERE _AM_ I?" as Dr. Nefarious did the screaming for her.

Relief flooded her body. "Nef! You're alive!" Elaris called out. There was a quiet "sir" behind her.

Nefarious didn't hear them, paid neither of them absolutely no heed as he tried to gather his bearings. The mangled robot frantically looked around in every direction to see who had done this to him, his one remaining eye rattling in his eye socket, but his vision was blurred. He did make out a faint shape of his butler so he calmed out a bit. Good, maybe Lawrence was repairing him like he always did.

This, however, felt _different_ to Dr. Nefarious and confusion washed over him. How _did_ he survive that station explosion and end up in a fuzzy void that at least contained a Lawrence-shaped blob? He tried to get up from his spot, only to find that he had no control over his legs or left arm. Confusion deepened into rage.

"What's going ONNN?" he demanded as he tried to raise his legless torso up higher. His right arm weakly scrambled for a grip on the workshop table, digging furrows into the surface. He was helpless! _Weakened!_ He practically roared in hatred as he could feel his own chest ripped open, his own body parts open to the world. He wanted _annihilation!_ Bloodshed! **Death!**

Then he felt someone grab his functional arm and he yelped.

"Don't you _**DARE**_ lay a hand on me!" he yelled, turning his face to his mysterious assailant, his eyelids narrowed. He glared at the shapeless purple blob in front of him. None of his current minions were purple!

Elaris took this opportunity to examine his face more closely, even as he tried to struggle away from her. His eyes were definitely damaged and would need heavy repair to get both lens working again.

' _Maybe he was looking directly at the space station explosion when it happened?'_ she wondered to herself as Nefarious kept wordlessly grunting in rage as he tried to fight back against her. It can explain his behavior being more erratic and the huge crack running down the right side of his face. His head was shifting around as he tried to get a better look at his surroundings, his eye parts clanging loudly in his sockets.

Without thinking, Elaris let go of his arm and used both of her hands to clutch his face. She brought his face as close to her's as she could manage so that he could see better. Elaris could see Lawrence tense up on the other side of the workshop as she did something incredibly stupid.

"Nefarious!" she said, raising her voice and locking eyes with him. "It's me! Elaris! Remember?"

The world seemed to freeze. Elaris winced, mentally preparing herself for another loud outburst. She was within inches of Dr. Nefarious's face and he had a scream that could make the lead vocalist of a death metal band weep in terror.

Instead, his expression slowly softened. His brows unfurrowed and his jaw unclenched as he stared wordlessly at her, bathing her both the green and red lights of his robotic head as his ruined eyes tried to focus on her. He was still the supervillain that entire galaxies hated, the monster that tried to unmake time itself, but now he looked vulnerable. _Scared._ His hand gently grasped her right arm.

"...Ellie?" he said, in a voice so tiny - so _normal_ \- that it sounded awkward coming out of his mouth.

That word pierced Elaris's heart and she let go of his head in shock. He still remembered the nickname he would use for her in college. He remembered _her_.

"Elaris, _no_. What are you doing here?!" he asked, in a normal speaking volume that hurt her heart more than his screaming fit from earlier. "You can't be seen with me! They'll put you in prison, you'll lose your job, you'll lose your home, you'llyou'llyou'll-"

"Sssh, stop," she said, putting a finger where his lips would be if he still had them. "I'm repairing you."

"Lawrence can repair me!" he said, raising his voice back to the normal Dr. Nefarious voice volumes. Lawrence raised a finger and started to say something but Nefarious cut him off. "You're putting yourself in danger!"

"I am very aware of the risks I'm taking just by helping you. I _want_ to help you."

"Elaris..." he started, but the fight was completely drained from him. He sounded defeated.

"It's okay, Nef. Everything's going to be okay," she said, gently reassuring both herself and her patient. "I'm going to take a look at your head first, if that's alright."

She reached over and touched his face again, gently rubbing the area of his scarred eye. He flinched a bit at her touch at first - memories of how he got his scar still burning fresh in his mind - but then he relaxed. He no longer put up a fight as she cupped his face in her two hands and turned it this way and that, mentally spotting all the different things that would need repairs. His eyelids closed happily.

No one spoke. No one needed to.

As she sat there, looking at his beaten up and torn body while she held his head in her hands, she felt remorse, now a familiar enemy, stab her in the heart again like a bunch of shrapnel. Again, she found herself wondering if, had they kept in contact, this wouldn't have happened.

Dr. Nefarious watched her with blurred vision and wondered the exact same thing.

She let go of Dr. Nefarious and moved back to the screen that showed the broken robot's vitals. Lawrence sidled up to her wordlessly. The three of them all sat in awkward silence until Dr. Nefarious cleared his throat and pointed to his eyes, hoping Elaris would get the hint. She nodded and began gathering up all of the necessary tools to repair his vision. Lawrence smiled, pulled up a chair, and watched eagerly as someone else did the hard work for a change.

"I'm going to lower your power supply." she said, speaking the first words in several minutes. "I warn you, this is going to feel a little funny..."

The battery that Dr. Nefarious was hooked up to acted like a life support in a way. The more power she fed him, the more active he was. She grabbed the dial and lowered it just enough that he wouldn't wiggle around as she poked around his eyes with a screwdriver.

Unbeknowst to her, it did come with a funny side effect, one that she never really encountered when repairing other, less complicated robots. With his battery set at such a low setting, he started to act like an organic being that was pumped full of painkillers. As she gripped his jaw and tightened the lens back into place, he smirked at her, eyelids droopy.

"I...forgot how beeuuteefuull you were Elaris..."

She nearly dropped his head in response. Her face flushed a dark magenta at his remark. Lawrence tried to hide a giggle.

" _Laaaaawrenceeee_...yo really sent an ANGEL to repair m..me..."

"Oh yes sir, she's the best at what she does." he called, smirking.

"Not you too!" Elaris shouted to Lawrence, her hands still holding a giggling Nefarious's head. Elaris was flustered and threatened to whack Lawrence with the tiny wrench she had in hand. He looked over and gave an understanding nod. When he gave that playful hint of messing with Nefarious back on the ship, she didn't expect him to also do that to _her!_

* * *

After restoring his eyesight and weathering more comments about how attractive and smart and funny she was, she dialed up the battery power and Dr. Nefarious acted like himself again. Both mechanic and butler decided not to bring up the whole "angel" bit, knowing they'd just get vehement denial in response. She began working on attaching his other arm, instigating some small talk as she did.

"So...uh...What evil plan backfired on you this time, Nef?"

He didn't speak - stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the fact that Elaris was using his high school nickname freely - but he shot a sharp look in her direction. He exhaled, propping up his head by placing his one remaining hand, curled into an angry pointy fist, underneath his chin.

Now that he was getting used to the idea of Elaris repairing him and he could see what was happening around him, he was letting his trademark foul mood seep back into his system. He didn't appreciate Lawrence calling _her_ of all people to help. He didn't want that part of his past dug up. It was a treasure, meant to be buried and as far away from his current operations as possible.

"I wanted to use the great clock as a time machine to erase Qwark and all other dogooders from the very fabric of space and time!" he said grouchily. "I wanted the villains to have a chance at winning - their time to shine in the light of victory! - but then Clank and his stupid squishy sidekick Ratchet got in the way!"

"You wanted to use **_a time machine_** to fix your mistakes?" Elaris asked in disbelief.

"...Y-yes?" Nefarious responded, stammering. He thought it was a _great_ plan!

Elaris, a woman of science and with an intensive laundry list of degrees under her belt, continued. "How did you not know about the paradoxes and rifts you'd create in the process? This universe has already taken so much temporal damage that even shifting the timeline backwards by a tiny fraction would destroy whole galaxies! Innocent people could have died! _...I_ could have died."

Nefarious froze up at her remark. He didn't plan on having _her_ killed in his rampage to get back at Qwark, but slowly, he began to realize that he was so blinded by his hatred for the green-clad, heavily chiseled hero that he nearly did just that. Was he feeling...remorseful? He hated that feeling. It was a _squishy_ feeling. All he could do was look at Elaris, mouth hanging slightly open like a broken ventriloquist dummy, but he couldn't bring himself to say anything.

Elaris, on the other hand, was embarrassed over her remark. She blushed, looked down at his arm, and fidgeted with a loose piece. Once again, no one spoke, the conversation dying between them. Why did she _say_ that? Why did she bring that up? Dr. Nefarious is hellbent on his revenge against the universe; he has no time to overlook all the small details of his plans when he's busy laying waste to all those who have wronged him.

Still, he can't be that stupid...can he? He's a genius - voted smartest man in the universe - but he couldn't put two and two together over how a plan like that could fail so miserably?

Lawrence walked in with a cup of tea for her, reading the room as he saw their uncomfortable silence, and then decided to take Dr. Nefarious's weakness as a golden opportunity to knock the doctor down a peg or two. His expression not changing but his circuits screaming in glee, he looked at both of them and spoke.

"Well, **_I_** knew the plan was going to blow up in our faces."

Dr. Nefarious stared at Lawrence in shock. So did Elaris. Lawrence continued.

"Did I not warn you about the paradoxes, sir? Did the Lombax not warn you as well? I know you rarely think before making up your plans, but this last adventure very nearly destroyed the entire universe starting with the two of us and I have to take a moral stance against that sort of ghastly behavior. To call our latest venture the work of a true idiot would be an insult to idiots, since most idiots have a sense of self-preservation." Lawrence said, idly stirring the cup of tea meant for the one organic being in the room. He never raised his voice but you could _hear_ the distaste on his tongue.

Nefarious stared blankly at the butler, still stunned into silence by Lawrence's sudden but quiet and dignified outburst. He hated to say it, but Lawrence was _right_. That _was_ a stupid plan if he was going to die in the process. This wasn't the first reality check that was gifted to him by his gracious butler over the years and he could tell by his smirk he was ready to hand out more. He seethed, unable to counter anything that was said.

As he silently burned with anger, he heard a click in his empty socket and immediately he had control over his left arm again. With a cackle of glee he waved his left hand in front of his face. Sure, he felt a bit ashamed for having Elaris see him in this state and repair him, but he also felt warm and fuzzy inside that she even agreed to it. And she was doing a good job too! His face softened, hand still suspended in mid-air.

"I forgot how good you were at this, Elaris. I should have called you earlier."

Elaris, noticing this shift in behavior, relaxed a bit.

"And get blown up alongside you? Flattered, but no thanks."

He laughed, a warm, genuine chuckle that didn't resemble his normal fits of maniacal villain laughter.

"Who said anything about explosions? There are days when I'm just doing something casual."

"What's casual for you?"

"Okay fine! You got me!"

She giggled. He chuckled back. They locked eyes with each other and, in that moment, they both knew in a very sobering moment what was still there lingering between them. That little spark was still flickering in both of their hearts, and they were both too scared to light it up again.

As they quickly looked away and both immediately became super interested in the wiring in Dr. Nefarious's chest that was spooled out on the workshop table, Lawrence, who was occupying himself by quietly dusting one of the counters nearby (Elaris was unfortunately as sloppy as his boss), shot a glance at their direction and sneered.

"Who are they trying to fool...?"

* * *

Elaris, sipping a cup of tea, began messing with the wiring in his chest, trying to find the bits and pieces that controlled his legs while also keeping a safe distance in case his reflexes kicked in. Dr. Nefarious - dissected operation patient - could see that she was struggling (after all, there was no operating manual for him when his very existence as a robot was a complete cosmic accident) so decided to help.

Using his free hand that wasn't being used to prop himself up, he pointed to a long red and blue wire hanging out of his chest with a helpful claw.

"See that? Give it a pinch with those clamps." he instructed.

Nodding, Elaris did just that and his right leg sprung up in the air, nearly kicking her square in the jaw. Startled, Elaris took a step back, as she wasn't expecting such a quick reaction. She let out a laugh once the situation kicked in. There he was laying on a clunky table with a leg reaching straight for the stars. As she circled the table, looking for the possible solution, his face cringed from embarrassment.

"Are you able to bring it back down? Or are you going to be stuck like that for a while?" she asked, gently poking him.

"Oh ha ha! I can…try."

He struggled but his leg really was stuck like that. He even tried bring it back down with force using both of his arms.

"Lawrence was right..." he said in the genuine remorse normally reserved for the death of a close relative. "I never think anything through..."

Elaris continued to hold in her laughter as all Nefarious could do was hide his face in his freed hand.

* * *

It took another good hour before she got the wiring right. Dr. Nefarious's leg landed unceremoniously on the table with a loud metallic thud, scaring the daylights out of Lawrence, who was deeply invested in a swashbuckling novel at the time. Her face beamed, fist pumping the air at her accomplishment.

"Are you able to move it now?" She asked.

"YES!" shrieked her patient in glee. His face lit up in delight as he was able to move and bend his right leg at will. He frantically kicked it in as many directions as he could manage from his place on the table as Elaris watched him with a big, sleepy grin plastered on her face. They still had a long ways to go, but this was a great start.

Nefarious looked back at her, foot hanging in the air in a mock kung-fu pose, and his smile faded a bit. For the first time, he noticed how exhausted she looked. Oil stained her face and hands and her light grey uniform had turned into more into a shade of smoky grey as she smiled at him, bags forming underneath her eyes. Her body was swaying a bit as she fought to keep herself standing.

Nefarious then thought about how he only saw her drink coffee and tea as a form of nourishment. She wasn't eating either. Organic life forms needed food and sleep.

Lifting a hand up, he pointed to his butler. "LAWRENCE! I _demand_ that you make this woman eat something and go to bed! If she's up any longer she'll pass out and probably die!"

Lawrence sighed, gently pushed a bookmark into his paperback copy of 'Sea of Thieves: The Hungering Deep', and rose from his chair. Elaris held up both of her hands in a gesture of pleading.

"Pfft I won't _die_ if I don't sleep! I'm perfectly fine!" she insisted.

Eyes from two different robots narrowed towards her direction.

"What time is it, Elaris?" Dr. Nefarious asked plainly.

"I..." She stopped. Elaris's shoulders deflated. "...see what you mean."

Elaris shrugged and agreed to his orders. She couldn't fight him on this, not when he was being so logical for once. She had a tiny bed and a small cooking area with a microwave, some snack bars, and some boxed ramen in the other room, for those days where she had to work on particularly long projects. Plus Dr. Nefarious still had a few days of repairs left and she couldn't stay awake that long even if she wanted to.

"You sure you'll be okay, you know," She gestured broadly with her arms. "-laying on that table by yourself?"

"Pfft! Don't worry, Elaris! _Lawrence_ will keep me company, right?"

Lawrence shot a pleading look towards the woman. She smirked back in response. She waved goodnight to the two intergalactic criminal robots before disappearing into a hidden room. The quiet sound of snack food aluminum was almost immediately followed after with the sound of deep snoring.

Once she was gone, Nefarious finally had the perfect opportunity to yell at Lawrence properly. His smile instantly faded and he turned on Lawrence, growling like a caged animal, his claws hanging open as if he wanted to disembowel the other robot in the room.

"Lawrence!" he barked, bristling. "Why, out of all people, did you call _her?_ Why did you think it was a good idea to drag _her_ into this mess!?"

Lawrence, still feeling bold, folded his arms.

"Well then, _sir_ , mind explaining why she's still in your phone contacts? You never told me about her and usually you _love_ sharing your romantic endeavors with anyone within earshot of you."

Nefarious clenched his jaw and narrowed his gaze.

"What makes you think that I..." he grinded the two working parts of his mouth together, struggling to say the next few words. " _Love_ her?"

Lawrence, arms still crossed, also narrowed his eyes. He was not dignifying that lie with a verbal response.

"Fine! Maybe I _do_. A little. Just a bit. It's _nothing_ , really..."

"Better you tell me what's going on or I'll wake her up and you'll have to tell her yourself."

"OKAY FINE! _FINE!_ But speak of this to no one."

He told the same story Elaris had back on the ship. He talked about them being good friends in high school and college, the two bullied nerds that shared a love for learning the secrets of the universe and later, yes, a small romance. He especially enjoying talking about their mischievous endeavors during lunch breaks and summer vacations, sometimes puctuating his backstory with elaborate waves of his arm.

But then, a strange sort of pain seeped into his voice, something Lawrence rarely ever heard coming from the normally elusive doctor. His voice dropped in volume and he dragged a hand across his face as he shared how he regretted being upset with Elaris on the day she left for the Bogon Galaxy. He wanted to be there and wish her goodbye but instead he stormed off and was hiding in the library pretending to study.

"I thought that...maybe she hated me for that, so I was too scared to give her a call." he admitted lamely. He kept trying to find the perfect opportunity to finally speak to her again, but then life caught up, played a sick prank, and turned him into a robot that now lay in pieces in the workshop of his old crush's workshop.

"This has to be a cruel joke, Lawrence. The universe must be laughing at me." he whined, resting his chin against the table. He wanted to tell Lawrence about how he still cared for her, how he kept her a secret to protect her from his evil schemes. He chickened out. Admitting that would admit that he knew that his presence in Elaris's life was poisonous to her career.

"It's not just the universe, sir." Lawrence added with a subtle smile.

Nefarious seethed. If he could get up and slap that butler silly, he would.

"She must be very important to you." Lawrence added.

Out of pure stubbornness, Dr. Nefarious refused to answer his butler. But, once again, he was right. Elaris _was_ important to him. Still is, apparently. He lay on that clunky table looking up at the large metal ceiling that arched over them. Nefarious never was one to admire architecture - not unless if it looked suitably evil - but he was still very impressed with the setup that she was given. He let himself be a little glad that she followed a better path than he did.

She really was better off without him. _That_ was the important thing.

' _By saving my life, I could be ruining her's.._.' he thought bitterly to himself. For any other person, he would've found this funny and would've cackled evilly in delight. Instead, he felt nauseous. Even though he was now physically incapable of doing so, Dr. Nefarious felt like throwing up.

Deep in reflection, he didn't notice the faint beeping from the computer he was hooked up to, Lawrence looked over and quietly warned him that he needed to recharge. Sleep wasn't something he ever needed - five minutes hooked to a direct power source when he was low on energy and he was ready to go - but in his current, weakened state, it might take much longer.

Sighing in defeat as Lawrence adjusted a few levels, Nefarious let himself fall 'asleep', horrid thoughts still swirling about his brain.

_She really was better off without me..._

_She...was...better...without me..._

_...She..._

* * *

End of Chapter 2.


	3. The Inner Workings of a Supervillain

Chapter 3

* * *

After sleeping a good twelve or so hours in a dreamless, wakeless state that would be envied by college students and retail workers across the galaxy, Elaris was up in the early hours of the morning, getting ready to spend another day on repairing the galaxy's most hated supervillain.

As she hummed the Annihilation Nation theme song to herself, she looked down at the blue holographic copy of Dr. Nefarious's broken body that was floating in front of her face. She'd rotate it with a flick of her finger, enlarge sections of it to make sure she didn't miss any spots as his circuits and joints lay bare before her.

So many thoughts were swirling through her head - some professional, but most of them more emotionally charged - that she didn't even notice the robot butler coming into her office with a cup of tea.

At first, Elaris took the cup of tea without saying a word beyond a gracious " _thank you_ ", eyes still focused on the grisly amusement park map of Dr. Nefarious's organs. But Lawrence hung around, watching her as she downed the glass of Earl Gray and sticking around in case she needed anything else.

Elaris had to hand it to him - despite working with someone who could no longer eat, Lawrence had a talent in brewing an almost sinfully good batch of tea.

"Lawrence...am I doing the right thing by helping him?" she finally said, turning in her office chair.

For a brief moment, Lawrence didn't speak. He rubbed his metallic chin with his index finger and thumb and looked up to the ceiling as his eloquent, well-mannered brain pieced together the right answer. The butler had only known this overly excitable purple mechanic for a couple days, but he had to admit, he had already taken a small liking to Elaris and wanted to be a little more careful wielding his rapier wit.

The words that did emerge from his voice box, however, were still sharp enough to hurt.

"If you want me to be honest, ma'am... _no_."

Elaris sighed in defeat but allowed him to continue. He did so, pouring her another glass of tea as he talked.

"You're helping an intergalactic criminal that is going to hurt thousands if not _millions_ of people with whatever wacky evil scheme pops into his brain the moment he leaves this workshop. To do the right thing would be to turn him in to the proper authorities while he's in this weakened state and let him - and, unfortunately, _me_ as well - rot in a maximum security prison cell. You'd be doing several galaxies a favor by stabbing us both in the back." he said at last.

Elaris buried her head in her arms resting on the table and groaned in frustration.

" _However_." Lawrence added, causing her to look up. "I can tell that you still care for him. It's the first time you've seen him since college, the first time you've talked to him since his unfortunate transformation into a skeletal robot monster with a clockwork heart and radio parts for brains, and instead of being repulsed, you two are picking up where you left off as if nothing happened. _Heartwarming_ , really."

Yes, it really was a moment meant for a Megacorp greeting card, Elaris thought bitterly to herself. It was like if Beauty and the Beast involved nuclear weaponry.

"I don't think he feels the same way..." Elaris interjected, not entirely believing her own words. She gestured at the hologram still floating above her work desk with one hand as she delicately held the cup of tea with the other. "He's probably just got a couple wires crossed..."

"Ma'am. If I may. I've been under the employ of The _Great_ Dr. Nefarious for many years - even spending a couple ghoulish years trapped on a tiny asteroid with him. I have a rather intensive understanding of how his fragile, often irrational and ill-thought out emotions work. There are many qualities to him that I can list and none of them are very flattering."

A smile then crossed Lawrence's lips, one that lacked the normal sarcasm that usually ran through Lawrence's circuits.

"When you woke him up, you brought back something that I haven't seen in him in years."

Elaris stared into her cup of tea like she was going to force herself to learn Tasseography right then and there. Lawrence, who noticed how Dr. Nefarious would stare at her in a certain way when she was busy working away, or how'd the mad scientist was interested in every word Elaris had to say, finally left the small office room with one final observation.

"And who knows, ma'am. Perhaps you'll be the one that can convince him away from his current career."

* * *

"Rise and shine, Nef!"

Dr. Nefarious, who was laying on his stomach and scrolling through his various social media feeds to see if they finally announced the cast list for the upcoming Lance and Janice Fletnix adaptation (and getting into some petty Internet fights about it in the process), was startled by a cheery voice that rang through the shop. His gPhone fell out of his claws and bounced on the floor.

As he watched Elaris approach the table that had become his home for the last couple of days, Dr. Nefarious couldn't help but notice how much _better_ she looked now. Not that she never looked bad, _no_ , his brain hastily corrected himself, but she definitely looked a lot better after getting some sleep and washing all the grime and engine oil off her face from the night before. He watched her intently, studying her movements in what he hoped looked like casual interest as she scanned his readings and saw that his battery levels had stabilized. She smiled at him, getting a Halloween-styled smile back.

"Looks like you got some sleep yourself!" she said.

"I sure did!" the mad scientist answered back, equally chipper.

"How have you been feeling?"

"...Good...?" he added hesitantly, not sure if she was asking about his health or just making small talk. Dr. Nefarious never really participated in any small talk in his current line of work. Evil minions never asked about the weather or if he saw any good movies lately and if they tried, he usually killed them.

"Okay, before I start hooking the rest of your leg wires together and get you walking today, I have to ask this question since your blueprints aren't giving me the answer..." she trailed off, knowing the next few questions were going to be a bit invasive and the last thing she needed was to set off his explosive temper. "-how is your sense of touch? Do you feel pain? Temperature? Texture?"

Dr. Nefarious's smile never faded. Instead of taking offense, he looked _delighted_ to talk about this subject.

"To be honest, I'm not really sure how much of it is actual feeling and how much of it is just the memory of it! When I turned into a robot, I lost two major senses - my sense of smell and my sense of taste-"

"You never had a sense of taste, sir." Lawrence playfully joked behind him. Dr. Nefarious continued, ignoring him, his voice now slipping into an excited, happier tone that instantly reminded Elaris of the person Nefarious was back in high school - the young, hopeful Nefarious who didn't have his spirits fully crushed by ruthless bullying yet and wanted to become a doctor because he wanted to _help_ people, not take over any planets.

Perhaps that part of him _didn't_ die when he transformed into a ruthless machine.

"-But I still remember what smells smelled like and what tastes tasted like so sometimes I'll see something that I'll remember the scent of and I can still smell it in my head even though I have no more olfactory receptors! I also have no tongue but you'd be surprised how many times I've forgotten that I don't need to eat because my brain needed a little comfort food."

"You _do_ have a stomach..." Elaris pointed out.

"It doesn't lead anywhere, and even then, I have no esophagus so the food just kinda gets mashed between my two working jaw parts. It makes a mess, trust me on this."

As he was talking, Elaris had moved behind him and was yanking the wires that controlled his other leg and was rewiring the jumbled clump. Now that she knew how his chimera-esque anatomy worked and what would happen, she was fixing up his other leg a lot faster and with general ease.

"As for touch," he continued, gesturing with his sharp, eviscerating claws. "I do have a sense of touch, but it works at a different magnitude than your average squishy. I can feel vibrations, temperature, and electric signals at a far better degree than an organic lifeform, but my sense of texture is not as great. I can't be as delicate, I've found."

"Honestly, Nef. You should write a book about this sort of stuff!" Elaris called out from behind him, her hands deep within the inner workings of one of his upper thighs. "I'm not sure if you fully realize this, but you really are the only instance of a full organic being being converted into a robot in the manner that you were without either dying in the process or being rendered a non-conscious machine with none of your original personality intact."

Dr. Nefarious laughed. "That's debatable! I'm not sure how much of me made it through the conversion intact. For all I know, I could be a tortured ghost attached to the skeletal remains of my own dead body, converted into metal in a freak accident, unable to move on and go beyond the veil..." he said, waving both of his arms through the air dramatically.

"Do you really believe that?" Elaris asked at the same time that she locked his other leg into place. Dr. Nefarious didn't answer at first, instead pausing to wiggle his other leg to check that everything was properly working and then complimenting Elaris on the fine handiwork, but then started to ruminate on that question when Elaris moved in front of him so that they can both look at each other face-to-face. Green eyes met red optics as his voice lowered in volume.

"My take on that theory is 'I really hope not', because I would hope that my soul would attach itself to a robot body that doesn't have headaches."

Elaris gave a quick laugh.

"You get headaches?!"

"I _know_ , right?!" Nefarious responded. He then reached up and lightly tapped the glass dome with a fist. "Does _any_ of that stuff in there look like it could get a headache? I've never been able to figure out an explanation for it, honestly! I certainly don't want to tinker around up there because what if all of my personality is stored in that giant gear or that little satellite dish?"

They talked some more, and soon, another breezy hour went by as Elaris unhooked a few things and began carefully putting all his wires and body parts back into the giant hole in his chest, carefully fixing any damage she spotted along the way. Even though his stomach was not connected to anything and was functionally useless, Elaris made sure that he walked out of her shop with the most pristine robot stomach he's ever had in his life. Same with his weird robot lungs, his weird robot circulatory system, and his weird robot ribs.

As she did so, Dr. Nefarious and Elaris kept talking to each other, both of them lightly playing catch-up with the other's life as the topic changed from Dr. Nefarious's eldritch anatomy to just what they've been doing since they parted ways back in college.

First Dr. Nefarious casually told her of all of his villainous exploits from the Bio-Obliterator to nearly destroying time, receiving only tiny questions here and there from the purple mechanic. A lot of it was stuff she already knew - Nefarious was no stranger to the intergalactic news reports - but there was some surprising things in there that never got reported on, like how, after he turned into a robot, he spent a good week having to reprogram his evil lair because he stupidly made all of his security systems registered to his former body's fingerprints.

When he finished, he sat back and listened intently as Elaris told him of her much more mundane life, from her gradual rise through the Gadgetron ranks after getting her two degrees to how, one time, she had to quickly move to a different apartment because there was an infestation of mutant sandflies that caused the entire complex to become condemned by the city council. It was a life that seemed as alien to him as building a space station shaped like your face was alien to her, and he found himself engrossed in her various landlord disputes and how she once dated a woman named "Debbie" for about six weeks.

"In the end, I just really want to start my own company and get away from Gadgetron. With my current budget it's more like a pipe dream than an actual achievable goal, and it's nice having this place, don't get me wrong, but I always felt like I was at the bottom rung of the Gadgetron ladder even though I've been here for years..."

The words ' _you can work for me!_ ' hung unsaid in Dr. Nefarious's throat, that train of thought destroyed before it could even leave the station. He knew she would never say yes.

"I just...I want to _help_ people, and I feel I'm not helping enough at this current job! Building weapons is fun and all, but this technology could be used for something better, you know? I want to save lives, not be yet another Hashtag Gadgetron Developer for the rest of my life."

With those words hanging in the air, she sealed up his chest. In that glorious moment, Dr. Nefarious - intergalactic scourge to squishies everywhere - was now whole again. If it wasn't for all the battle wounds and scratches still covering his body and the ghastly scar that was still etched across his face and dug a gash into his green glass dome, he'd look good as new. But she could take care of his paint job later.

Elaris wiped her forehead with a smudged rag, undoing her last shower by smearing herself with a fresh coat of grime.

"Okay, you look pretty fixed but we're gonna need to get you up on your feet and have you walk around first before I declare anything a success." she said, spreading more of the grime across her face. "Since your battery's stabilized it shouldn't be too much of a problem!"

"Oh yeah, aha…" he said uncertainly. He hated to admit it, but he was having fun just sitting around and talking.

She helped him sit up, gently pushing him backwards with her hand resting on his chest as one of his hands gripped the side of the table. Her robot patient swayed a bit, feeling a bit dizzy at first after being knocked out for a week straight.

"How are you feeling, Nef?"

His brain started to fog up again as gravity swiftly became his newest enemy. He leaned forward, smiling.

"Oh _yoou_..." he squinted his eyes, red optics unfocusing and refocusing like broken camera lens, as he still swayed on the table. "-you're that angel from b _ **eee**_ fore!"

Elaris's smile melted away instantly.

"Oh no."

Dr. Nefarious giggled, thoroughly lost in the sauce as she grabbed both of his clawed hands, the tips pinching through her gloves, and helped him up to his feet, pulling him off of the table. Elaris both wanted to see if he was able to stand on his own and was hoping that maybe his current foggy state was only a very temporary fluke.

Instead, He toppled over and fell flat on his jaw, dumb smile plastered on his face and giggles still rising from his metallic throat. Lawrence tried to hide a laugh and Elaris shot a mad look his way, keeping him quiet.

She reached out for his hand and tried to keep him steady. He tumbled and wobbled around the shop, mumbling sayings like a drunken space pirate.

"Lo...ok Lawrence I'm waa _al_ _ **kin**_ _g_ ag **ain**!"

"Yes, sir. Absolutely amazing, sir," came the dignified reply.

Elaris kept notes of his walking and speech patterns, typing hurriedly on a holographic screen suspended above one of her arms, watching intently to see if there was a change. It was weird seeing him like that - such a stark change from the megalomaniacal supervillain from the news broadcasts - but she couldn't help but giggle as he tripped on his feet or shouted about how much he loved Elaris.

After about thirty minutes of bumbling about, he stabilized more, being able to walk around without bumping into her, her ship, or the various work tables scattered throughout her shop.

His speech patterns on the other hand, still hadn't normalized. Elaris had to listen to him embarrass himself as she tried to figure out what was going on.

"Issn't sh..e cute? We went to h _iii_ _ **iiiiii**_ _g_ h school toge _ **theee**_...rr..."

As she scribbled note after note, each one punctuated by a frustrated question mark as she wondered where her repairs went wrong, Dr. Nefarious scuttled on over to her. In a fit of not being himself, slightly intoxicated Nefarious decided to do something awake Nefarious would later regret.

"W..wil you _dance with_ **m..e** Ellie...?"

That completely caught her off guard. She stopped, even as her notepad caught his voice and quickly scribbled his last remark in her notes.

Behind her, Lawrence, a small smile creeping to his normally serious face, gently pulled out his phone and waited for the right moment to record as Elaris could only watch as her patient took a couple steps in the other direction, twirled around the shop, bumped into her ship, apologized to her ship, accidentally left two claw marks on her ship, walked back up to her, and then finally stopped and held out his hand out to her.

"A _www_ come on… it'll beee _**fun!"**_

"Lawrence please help me." Elaris squeaked, eyes locked on the mad scientist in front of her.

Nefarious still had his hand out, his knife-like hands gleaming in the shop lights like affectionate daggers, and Lawrence looked at her with the smuggest grin she's ever seen on the butler.

Finally, she shrugged and dismissed her holographic notepad. What the hell? He's probably fogged out of his mind and won't remember a thing anyway. Might as well have a little fun.

As Elaris took his hand, the doctor giggled with excitement and immediately pulled her close. 'Dancing' probably wasn't the best word to describe what the two were doing. The right words to describe it were 'Nefarious holding her hands and swinging them back and forth like they were two children in a playground'. He'd twirl her around and she'd laugh, trying to keep herself from falling over.

As both supervillain and helpless damsel in distress cackled in glee, both of them having the time of their lives, Lawrence sat back, leaning against a wall, recording each and every bit. He couldn't wait to use this as blackmail against his employer. His one regret was that he couldn't post this video anywhere on social media without implicating Elaris for multiple felonies.

"Law **rence** look at us go _ **oo**_ , we're _soooo_ in l _ **ove**_!" Nefarious yelled.

"Oh, I'm sure you both _are_ ," Lawrence said, not a single lie hiding in his words.

With a final twirl, Nefarious fell unceremoniously to the floor with a loud crash, Elaris joining him with a scream. Her head spinning and her face flushed from his constant ' _I LOVE YOU ANGEL_ ' remarks, she slumped, her body intertwined with his.

The spinning ended up being good for one thing, Elaris would later note in her logs. It must have locked all the gears in his brain together, for Dr. Nefarious's expression quickly shifted from dazed happiness to a very stark and sober confusion as he found himself nowhere near the operating table.

 _'Why were they both sitting on the floor_?' Dr. Nefarious thought to himself as he felt a weight resting on his body. ' _Why does she look dizzy? Why was she in his_ _ **lap**_ _?_ ' Elaris noticed his change in behavior and inched away from her spot and quickly stood up. Composing herself, she spoke.

"We ran some tests to see if you were able to walk on your own and if your heart was holding a charge." Her tone was very professional but also very breathless. "It worked...buuuuut you got a bit carried away..."

"How carried away." Dr. Nefarious asked, running a hand across his face as he stared up at the ceiling.

Elaris bit her lip, unaccustomed to lying, but told a mild one to spare his dignity.

"You spun around the room and called yourself a pretty angel."

" _Oh_..."

Dr. Nefarious buried his face in both of his palms and groaned loudly. He did all of that! In front of Elaris and Lawrence! He knew the two would never let him live this moment down. Elaris got up and reached for his hand, giving him a wink.

"Oh don't worry ' _pretty angel_ ', I won't tell anyone!"

"Oh ha ha..." Apparently Lawrence was rubbing off on her.

The mad scientist got up, both hands still in her's, and he stood there, rooted to the spot. The phantom pain of embarrassment burned through his mental circuits and he could feel the sensation of his cheeks burning in his head - even though he lacked the skin neccessary _to_ blush - as he felt mortified about the whole ordeal he couldn't even remember. First he looked away, but then she quietly said something that pierced through his embarrassment in an instant.

"This is the most fun I've had in months..."

He found himself locking eyes with hers, his core body temperature rising and his internal battery fluttering. They just stood in that same spot, not moving, just _staring_ at one another. Words that had flowed so easily earlier between them were now catching on both organic and synthetic throats as they both studied one another, both unsure what to say next.

Lawrence, seeing a opportunity, coughed from behind Elaris and grabbed Dr. Nefarious's attention. Then, using his knowledge of two hundred different intergalactic languages at his disposal, said ' _TELL HER_ ' in sign language.

Dr. Nefarious finally found the ability to speak.

"Elaris...I..."

Her eyes widened. She squeezed his metallic hands, waiting for him to speak.

"I...uhh...I wish to be painted purple."

Her hopeful smile turned to a disappointed frown, her entire face falling. It killed the mood, but the tension dissipated around them, freeing them from their nervous prison.

"Oh..." Elaris answered, trying not to sound too disappointed. "...yeah I can get that sorted out..."

She left the semi embrace, her fingers leaving his claws but still leaving behind the sensation from her touch, and was heading towards the workbench when Lawrence popped up from his hiding spot behind the ship. Locking eyes with the doctor, first he motioned his hands to her and then, with his delicate gloves, began to sign three words.

_'JUST TELL HER'_

Dr. Nefarious first waved him away and then, using his giant claws, signed a clunky response.

_'NOT NOW!'_

Lawrence narrowed his gaze. His hands practically radiated with a dignified anger.

_'IF YOU DON'T I WILL'_

Crossing his arms, Dr. Nefarious locked eyes with his butler in sheer contempt.

_'TOMORROW'_

_'YOU BETTER'_

Elaris looked over to her patient after catching some strange movements from the corner of her eye. "Is everything alright?".

' _YES_ ' Nefarious signed. "I mean! Yes." he added hastily, fist still bobbing. He then approached her, walking up to her slowly, and then gently placed a clawed hand on her shoulder, his expression softened as he did.

"Actually, there's something else I'd like to tell you! But I want to save it for tomorrow. You know, after you got some rest, We're all pretty tired from being locked up in the shop all day so I thought, hey, it probably would be better if I told you after you've rested! Tomorrow's a _great_ time!" he said, smiling so awkwardly that his grin looked painful. The words, tumbling out of his mouth at too fast of a pace, sounded mechanical. He just wasn't used to casual conversation. The awkward kid from high school was coming back with a vengeance and Nefarious hated every moment of it.

"I...guess?" was Elaris's only response.

Dr. Nefarious mentally cursed himself as he saw worry wash over her. Well _great,_ he should have not told her that. Now she wasn't going to get any sleep. This whole 'small talk' thing was still new to him, this whole process of saying words that weren't screamed commands or yelled declarations of his mental superiority to some hapless squishy.

"If you're worried about what it is, it's about my new paint job! Repairs have been fantastic Elaris, better than what Lawrence could have done!"

Walking into the room with a nightly cup of tea for her, the butler added to his boss's statement, hoping to gracefully save the mad scientist from the brink of emotional disaster.

"He's right. I once screwed his head on backwards and he had a front row seat to his-"

" _Lawrence!_ That's enough." he said, sounding surprisingly mature. With a delicate claw, he then pointed at Elaris. "Now, you go get some sleep! You need it."

Elaris gracefully took the cup of tea and smiled at the both of them. She had to admit, this whole fiasco still felt like a dream. A wacky, funny, interesting dream.

"You take care of yourself, Nef!" she said, sipping the tea.

Not sparing any more words, she quietly thanked them both and left for her room, feeling the concerned gaze of a supervillain and his tired butler burn in the back of her head as she disappeared out of sight.

* * *

Once she was gone, Dr. Nefarious let out a very long and overly dramatic sigh, his chest heaving. Tomorrow was the day, he decided. The day he confessed and told her everything. Lawrence would finally get to hear the mad scientist be caring towards someone who wasn't named "Dr. Nefarious" and tease him about it for the rest of his life.

As he climbed back on his operating table and let himself stew in his own emotions, he waited for Lawrence to hook him up to charge.

"You think telling her that I..." he decided not to say the L word again, "-still _care_ for her is a good idea, Lawrence?" he asked in a low voice.

"I get the hunch that she can already guess just from your actions, sir, and she certainly seems to _care_ about you an awful lot back. Repairing you, breaking at least twenty different intergalactic laws, even agreeing to dance with you when you were suffering from a minor malfunction-"

"Wait." He propped himself up on a shoulder, turning his head to look at Lawrence.

"I _danced_ with her!? _**WHEN?!"**_

Lawrence pulled out his phone and showed him footage of what happened hours before, immediately destroying Elaris's lie. That definitely wasn't dancing - more like him swinging the poor woman around - but she seemed happy in the video.

"Oh, it was _delightful_ sir. You even called her ' _my love_ '." Lawrence teased.

Nefarious wordlessly pushed himself off the table, grabbed a pipe that was sitting nearby, and held out the pipe to Lawrence.

"TAKE ME OUT, LAWRENCE! I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE!"

His butler took the pipe and placed it on the floor, shaking his head in disagreement as he did.

"She didn't question it one bit, sir. It was ruled out to be your brain not functioning properly, parts not clicking the right way, or battery levels being low. She even wanted to spare you a little dignity as a bonus, something none of your previous partners would've done."

Lawrence paused, sighing wistfully as if he was enjoying a good romance novel unfold in front of him.

"But dearie me...something tells me that you've been dying to tell her this for _years_ but never had the courage, am I right?"

' _Ah yes, he's talking about the phone contact_ ,' Dr. Nefarious thought to himself as he seethed. That little number that ended up saving his life, when previously it sat in his phone for years as a mockery of his own buried feelings. The little name that he kept adding new emojis to as he considered the possibility that maybe _this_ would be the day that he finally calls Elaris and ask how things had been since high school.

"Oh I hate how right you are..." came his final answer.

Then, in a movement so fast it startled Lawrence, Nefarious flung his hands upwards, puncturing the air with his sharp talons, as he gestured wildly.

"But what if she doesn't feel the same way!?" he practically screamed. "I don't want her to be weirded out over a big scary robot being in love with her!"

Lawrence tapped a finger to his chin as he realized - rather sourly - that he was currently trapped between two adults who were both equally incapable of confessing their love for one another without using _him_ as a middle man.

"That pipe _does_ sound like a good Plan B now that you mention it..."

Nefarious looked over to the spot they danced around in, once again tuning his butler out. Surely she felt _something_ about the doctor? _Friendship_ , maybe? She was so willing to help so naturally it must've been that. It had to be something there besides the raw pity for a broken, insane creature that you once knew in high school.

But _why_? They've been separated for so long that it felt hopeless to bring that kinda relationship back. It was all in the past, he told himself over and over. He already tried changing the past once, after all, and look how well _that_ turned out. She doesn't need to be dragged into his awful life.

' _But she did just that! How many laws was she breaking!?'_

"Just...hook me up already, Lawrence. I can't keep putting this off forever..."

* * *

End of Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta quickly point this out or else I feel no one's going to notice this - Lawrence and Dr. Nefarious both knowing sign language is a reference to their very first appearance in Up Your Arsenal where Dr. Nefarious is giving the big speech while Lawrence is in the corner doing fake sign. This is both my favorite cutscene in my game and also...strangely not referenced in fanworks that often? Gotta hand it to Dr. Nefarious - he may be a vicious madman but he also tries to make sure to make his big supervillain speeches more accommodating for the hearing impaired.


	4. Confessions

Chapter 4 - Confessions

* * *

It was the early hours of the morning - when the sky outside of the windowless and rather unremarkable workshop that Elaris owned was barely turning pink - when Lawrence found himself deep in thought.

He was the only one up, with his boss still resting on the worktable from his Lombax-inflicted wounds and his squishy doctor/maybe-friend/maybe-somethingmore sleeping in another room. Dr. Nefarious was sleeping on his stomach with a work tarp draped over him and his head resting on a cushion. His arms dangled off the sides, his claws limp. If it weren't for the mess of cables running from several machines reading his vitals to his back - where a panel had been pulled open to reveal several outlets - he almost looked like a sleeping organic being. The radio parts in his glass dome head even made a noise that sounded like a metallic snore.

As Lawrence occupied himself by cleaning random objects strewn throughout the workshop - and finding himself mildly disgusted with Elaris's utter inability to dust her belongings - he found himself admiring his uncharacteristic bout of boldness that he allowed himself to have yesterday.

He adjusted some Funko Pops sitting on a desk and shuffled Elaris's paperwork, noting her impeccable handwriting. He had to admit, his gentle prodding of both Elaris and Nefarious throughout the day was probably going to show some results today once they both woke up and had to verbally communicate the feelings boiling between them.

Would it end in disaster? Would they immediately throw themselves into each other's arms and start planning for a wedding? Either way, Lawrence was excited to see the results. As excited as Lawrence could be, anyway. Extreme emotions were never his forte.

' _But what is the endgame?'_ he thought to himself. He was considering the events of this past week as he gently lined up Amiibo.

Surely, if anything, it would make more sense to keep Nefarious and Elaris detached from one another so that they could both walk away from this incident without ever speaking of it again. The less ties to people who could report them to the authorities, the better. Elaris could go back to her job at Gadgetron, and Nefarious could continue chasing lombaxes, backpacks, and obnoxious green-clad superheroes.

Lawrence locked eyes with some sort of plastic yellow hamster on Elaris's desk as if waiting for a proper answer.

It was the way Nefarious talked to her, he gradually realized. In the years that passed since that fateful day, when he answered a young mad scientist's wanted ad and was immediately told that his job was to clean his evil lair full of green slime and discarded newspaper clippings, Lawrence had grown to learn all of Dr. Nefarious's little quirks.

Well, "quirks" was being a little too nice. The man had a laundry list of negative personality traits ranging from the slightly annoying to the "by every galactic religion out there this man needed some therapy" and all of them only got worse when he got messily converted into a robot and Lawrence had to gently teach a newly metallic employer the ways of the robot as he still screamed in fresh agony and shivered like a baby fawn.

Dr. Nefarious _was_ capable of love - and he could feel it as intensely as his thirst for vengeance and his world-destroying wrath - but his relationships were doomed to end in explosive fights and screaming matches. He collected exes the way Elaris collected useless plastic figures.

But yesterday? Dr. Nefarious sounded...normal.

Elaris had a fascinating, calming effect on him. One that he wanted to see more of.

If you grabbed Lawrence's arm and twisted it violently until the wires started to tear, perhaps you'd get him to admit that he did, in fact, _care_ enough about Dr. Nefarious's well-being that he hoped that there was a chance that the mad scientist would finally free himself from all the mental traumas he picked up over the years and end up with a happy ending.

Lawrence had once made peace with the fact that the only way he was getting out of Dr. Nefarious's contract was if Nefarious died or was made to rot in a maximum security prison, but now there was a glimmer of hope in a long, dark tunnel.

It was slim, but you always did regret the chances never taken.

"Ah, young love..." Lawrence mused out loud only somewhat sarcastically as he rested his chin on a dainty palm.

The Pikachu amiibo didn't reply.

* * *

Morning came around and Elaris, after a freshly brewed cup of tea, did her regular routine of checking his vitals and waking the criminal supervillain up. Everything was working in perfect condition and she couldn't be more happy with the results. All it'd take was a couple more days of rest and her patient would be working better than he did in years.

Elaris didn't want to think about what he would _do_ once he left her workshop. Her mind was already occupied with so many other swirling thoughts.

She was quieter this morning, her normally chatty self now deep in thought as she examined his eyes and checked some of his moving parts to make sure everything was moving properly. Her lips were pursed, brow knitted together in concentration as she tested the pressure and grip of both hands. Elaris only said a minor hello back when she got a greeting from her patient. It was clear that her mind was in a different place, and while it mildly concerned Dr. Nefarious, he didn't want to prod too deeply into it.

Elaris then left to go take a shower, leaving Dr. Nefarious to concoct his latest scheme.

This was it, he told himself as propped himself up on the table with both shoulders until he looked like the galaxy's worst sphinx. He was going to _confess_. He was going to tell Elaris that he harbored a secret crush on her for years and that he still loved her and wished to whisk her away and move the very stars in the wake of his love.

And he was going to do it in the most extravagant way possible!

After ruling out anything with smoke machines, clouds of rose petals, or fireworks, Dr. Nefarious then tried to think of the best Lance and Janice quote off the top of his head. Something simple yet steamy and full of _feral mystique_.

That failed, so he turned on his phone and began searching for quotes, knowing in his heart that there had to be one that would accurately describe what he felt. After a couple minutes of determined searching, Nefarious slowly got distracted and he began reading random articles on the Lancipedia while forgetting why he was searching for Lance and Janice information in the first place.

The robot was so engrossed in the identity of Lance's mom (and making a mental note to rewatch that episode) that he only barely noticed Elaris sheepishly approaching him, her hands idly twirling a clean dust cloth as she gazed down at the floor. Her voice was small, as if she didn't want to disturb him.

"Nef...I have something I gotta tell you. It doesn't have anything to do with the repairs and it's not bad news and it's no big deal really, you can just ignore it if you don't like it, it's fine-"

Dr. Nefarious looked up from his phone, instantly noticing how fidget-y she was acting. He thought about her actions from earlier and realized that his love confession had to wait.

"What's the matter?" he asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

It was the way he said that question - the very casual tone that was never present on the Channel 64 News whenever they were discussing one of his latest atrocities - that pierced her heart. Elaris sucked in a deep breath and exhaled, breathing in the scent of lavender and sandalwood lingering on her skin. She realized much too late that he wasn't going to notice her perfume.

"...I think I...like you." she admitted lamely, a blush forming on her cheeks.

Dr. Nefarious's phone fell from his numb hands and clattered to the floor.

"I'm so sorry I know it's sudden..."

Several things happened at once. As Elaris stumbled on her words in a rapid waterfall of pent-up feelings, sparks flew from Dr. Nefarious's head, his jaw went slack, and his eyes spaced out as his brain mechanisms suddenly faltered. Elaris, who was scratching the back of her neck and saying that it was okay if he told her that she was dumb for still liking him, was suddenly interrupted by a Lance and Janice broadcast that was emanating from his mouth like dragon's fire.

_**"OH JANICE! MY HEART BURNS FOR YOU LIKE A THOUSAND SUNS! I WANT TO HOLD YOU CLOSE TO MY HEAVING MANLY CHEST AND NEVER LET YOU GO!"** _

_**"LANCE, WE MUST ACT QUICKLY! I THINK THE MOB HAS FOUND US!"** _

Elaris froze in place, her words dying in her throat from her sheer confusion. She stood there, watching him, unsure if he was pulling an elaborate prank on her. When no "gotcha!" arrived and he still sat there like a broken pizza place animatronic, she approached him cautiously like he was liable to explode at any moment.

Was he _broken_ again? But she was positive that she fixed him! Every diagnostic machine showed that he was running at perfectly normal levels!

Elaris lost her composure. When Nefarious didn't respond to her calling his name in increasingly panicked tones, she screamed for help.

" _LAAAAAAWRENCE!_ "

Like a British ninja, Lawrence promptly appeared behind her with both a curt "yes, ma'am?" and a feather duster, startling her and causing her to scream a second time. A smile was playing on Lawrence's metallic features as he examined the sad scene in front of them.

"Oh, you called my name just like _he_ would. You two really are rubbing off on each other!" he said with a playful giggle.

"Oh _nooooooo_..." Elaris responded in sadness as she sunk to her knees. The comatose robot next to her started making loud kissing noises, making the situation even worse.

"Now, you might be wondering why he's doing this." he started to explain, taking the tone of a college professor. Elaris instantly shot him a look that said ' _Yes, please continue_ '. "It's nothing you did, dear. _Dreadful_ little glitch, appeared after his first encounter with Captain Qwark in his brand new robot body. I didn't bring it up while you were putting him back together because I don't think there's really a way to fix it..."

Elaris stood up, forced herself to regain her composure, and gently grasped Dr. Nefarious's chin. She pulled the senseless robot's head closer to her face so she could see more clearly into the green glass that encased his brain. She watched the giant gear near his forehead move as if it had something physically jamming it. The other moving parts in his head responded in kind, shuddering back and forth.

"Fixing something like this would involve going deep within the circuits that make up his brain." Elaris said, her professional tone of voice returning as she allowed herself to calm down. She traced a finger across the glass surface as she kept staring at the scrap parts that housed the mind of someone she was growing fond of.

"The problem is, his accident made him a completely unique form of robot with no existing blueprints to go off of and well...if I mess up a connection in there, in all of those radio parts...I could _lose_ him!"

Lawrence knew the dark implication and nodded. The great hard drive failure. The system wipe. A death that most organics would never consider but robots _do_ , usually at three am when they let their minds wander or after they watch that one scene from Wall-E. If a careless mechanic went into Dr. Nefarious's brain and messed with the wrong wire, everything would be lost. His memories, his personality, his emotions...everything that made him who he was would disappear and you'd be left with an empty husk.

It was possible to back up a robot's personality and memories to a separate hard drive and load it into a new robot body just in case their core brain ever got destroyed, but the ethics behind such a transfer was still a hot debate in the robot community and was practically impossible to do without losing _something_ in the process. Robots who tried this usually emerged slightly different than their original selves, with personality traits altered or some of their memories gone. It just wasn't worth it.

Specialized brain surgeons for sapient robot citizens did exist but Elaris wasn't one, and no brain surgeon in the galaxy was going to help _him_. She could piece the rest of his body back together no problem, but going into his brain was much too great (and frightening) of a task.

"Does he do this often?" she asked as she still gently cradled Nefarious's face. According to the sounds arising from his throat, a car chase was currently taking place in that particular Lance and Janice episode.

"Only if he has a particularly intense emotional reaction to something." Lawrence explained dully, tapping his chin.

Icy cold guilt stabbed her in the heart.

"Oh no, I broke him..." she said with a weak little sob. She hugged his face tightly, muffling the sounds of screeching tires and machine guns.

"It's fine, dear. Just give him a good smack."

The softly spoken words made Elaris stare at Lawrence in horror.

" _Smack_ him?" she repeated, her voice cracking.

Lawrence sighed in exasperation. _Courtney Gears_ was able to catch on much faster than this.

"Watch."

Lawrence then balled one of his hands into the most dignified fist in the entire galaxy and firmly tapped Dr. Nefarious in the head like he was fixing an old TV.

" _WHAT?_ " Dr. Nefarious suddenly asked, not missing a beat. Elaris screamed in shock and let go of his face like it suddenly burst into flame, backing away as her patient started the delayed process of reacting to her new information. He blinked, frowned, smiled, then frowned again - all in the space of thirty seconds as his brain made noises that resembled a Playstation loading a new room in Resident Evil.

"Wait, when you say 'like' me..." Nefarious started, wildly communicating with his hands, his steak knife fingers tracing invisible diagrams. "-do you mean in the 'I tolerate you' way or 'I have feelings for you' way? Is this a like or a like-like?"

Elaris, still rattled from his little Lance and Janice episode, raised her voice. "It's a like-like! I don't know why but I think I'm becoming attracted to you, even though I was so sure the guy I liked back in college _died_ when he became a robot!"

Nefarious watched her, stunned into silence. His hands were still hanging in mid-gesture. His red optics stared at her, piercing the blackness of his skeletal eye sockets.

"It's weird!" Elaris continued as she started pacing the floor in front of him. "I would see the Dr. Nefarious in the news reports, the one who would threaten entire galaxies, the one who hated organics, the one with the weapons and the space stations and the sharp claws and glowing red eyes, and it was easy to look at that and say that the person you knew when you were younger had transformed into a monster and was _gone_ now!"

"But you're the same person! You're _different_ , yes...but it's so astonishing seeing how much hasn't changed! You're still you! And I missed you!"

His face didn't change expression at first and the silence still lingered after she finished. The awkward empty silence hung in the air for so long that Elaris was afraid that she caused another glitch. But instead, Nefarious slowly relaxed and he began idly tapping the workshop table with a claw as he mulled it over in his head.

" _Oh_...and I thought I was going to scare you by admitting that _I_ still have feelings for you..." he said at last. His dreams of smoke machine or firework confessions of heart-throbbing passion faded away in his clockwork head, replaced by more gentle words that weren't going to give the poor girl a heart attack.

"You...do?" asked Elaris shyly.

"How could I _not_ , Elaris?" he said, holding out his palms. "There's so many things to like about you! You're kind, you're smart, you're beautiful, you're funny, and you're one of the only people I've run into that treated me like a person rather than, well...as you said it, a monster." he said, looking down at his own hands.

Monster. _That_ was the loaded word circling his brain at that very moment. Despite the messy, painful circumstance that led to him becoming a robot - a memory that still haunted him to this day - Dr. Nefarious rarely looked at himself with any form of disgust. He hardly ever mourned the loss of his previous squishy self. Most of the time, he considered his new robot body an immense upgrade, one that was leagues better than the frail, bald little nerd that got winded from even the smallest amount of physical activity and needed special assistance to have straight teeth.

But 'rarely' didn't mean ' _never_ '.

There were moments of weakness where Dr. Nefarious missed being what he was and hated what he had become, and he was having one such moment right now as he stared at his claws and realized that a poorly judged hug could end in a hospital visit for Elaris and at least twenty stitches. Right now he wanted nothing more than to rush over and clutch her tightly to his chest and never let go, but he also didn't want to give the poor woman a concussion or to chip one of her horns.

"I may make poor decisions sometimes-"

"-Most of the time, sir-"

 _"-Sometimes_ " he insisted, raising his voice briefly. "-but even I could see that most of my past relationships happened because of my status. I was attractive to Courtney Gears and Cassie because I was a monster. They wanted a _monster_."

"You like me for who I am. Cassie was never curious about my accident or whether I had a sense of smell. You actually... _care_."

Her heart twisted at his dejected tone, the last word stabbing like a knife. She knew about Courtney Gears and Cassiopeia - they were also storied bad guys, and news was still fresh about the Valkyrie's assistance of Nefarious's plans to destroy time - but she wondered how often he looked at his past relationships with a bitter, melodramatic lens. Especially with one of them still being so fresh in his mind.

He probably felt _used_.

Without thinking, Elaris walked up to him without saying another word and pulled him into a tight hug. She wrapped her arms underneath the slots on his back that contained his wings and embraced the mess of a robot as tightly as she could. In response, he gently laid his head on top of her left shoulder and pressed one of his cheeks against hers. The sound of his fragile, clockwork brain filled her left ear.

Then, as slowly and as gently as he could manage, he wrapped both arms around her back and pulled her closer.

"I'm sorry for making this repair job really complicated." Elaris said, tracing her fingers against his back. She was delighted by how warm he was to the touch, the part of his body that housed his weird metallic guts that kept him going. In her mind, he was less the _corpse_ of an old friend and more like her actual old friend just now wrapped in tin foil and carrying a lot of extra mental baggage that needed sorting out.

"And I'm sorry..." he paused, as if the next words were physically painful to him. "...I'm like this."

He tried to say more but couldn't. How could he, when those words carried the weight of entire solar systems? They lingered in the embrace, organic and robot, for what seemed to be a long time. Neither of them wanted to let go. Letting go would mean time would pass again and their time together would become even shorter because soon he would have to leave.

But they would have to go back to reality sometime.

"So...now what." Elaris asked, after what seemed like a long time in her patient's surprisingly gentle hug. "We've just admitted we're both like each other - just a little bit! Nothing too serious! -" she hastily added in a last-minute bid to convince herself "-we're on opposite sides of the law, and you really only have one more day of repairs to go before I let you go free."

Nefarious's hands gently lifted off of her back so that he could place a quizzical claw underneath his chin. His brain made an actual loading noise again - a sound that reminded Elaris of game consoles running a triple A title - as he weighed possible options and he tapped his foot against the workshop table.

Finally, he said something that would've been ominous in any other circumstance.

"I have an idea..."

* * *

Elaris, Lawrence, and Dr. Nefarious all stood next to each other, admiring the mad scientist's handiwork with varying degrees of amazement. Elaris had a hand resting underneath her chin and looked deep in thought, Dr. Nefarious had his clunky hands resting on his hips in a display of mild triumph at a job well done, and Lawrence showed no strong emotion on his face but had his eyes narrowed like he was fighting back the onset of a migraine.

A plastic folding table was pulled from one of Elaris's side closets and placed down in front of them and covered with a red and white plaid tablecloth. Two crates - full of enticing bolts and were just screaming for a Lombax to smash them open - were set on opposite sides of the table, each with a seat cushion placed on top to make them more inviting as seats.

And finally, on top of the table, gently folded open and gleaming in the workshop lighting, still pristine from a lack of use, was an official playmat for the Exterminator trading card game.

"So, let me see if I fully understand what you're doing, sir." Lawrence said, barely disguising his brain's mixture of disgust and confusion. How did his life lead to this moment. Why was his boss _like_ this.

"-You have Elaris's full undivided attention, you two both admitted that you still like each other and care for one another, and your suggestion for an activity you two could do together is...a child's card game. The child's card game that you keep telequipped for some unearthly reason."

Dr. Nefarious, now shuffling a full deck of cards back and forth between his claws, shot a pointed look at Lawrence. "I fail to see a problem." he said in an even 'you'll-understand-my-genius-eventually' tone.

"He's right, Lawrence." Elaris chimed in immediately afterwards, jumping in to cover for him. "I've been working my butt off the past couple of days putting together a very confusing robot with no known blueprints back from the dead...no offense-" "None taken." "-and this seems like the perfect way to unwind."

"Yeah!" Dr. Nefarious agreed excitedly. " _Cassie_ and _Courtney_ never wanted to play this game with me! This is perfect!"

"Very well, sir. Happy...card battling." Lawrence said as it dawned on him he was outnumbered in this scenario. As he turned to dust more of Elaris's belongings and put as much distance between him and this sad display of raw nerdiness as physically possible, Dr. Nefarious started dealing out the cards. Then he placed the damage counters, which manifested one by one in a bright blue glow in his hands, in a neat little stack and he sat down, his voice assuming the same cadence of an overly excited middle schooler as the doctor refreshed Elaris on the rules.

He then showed Elaris the most valuable card in his collection - a holographic Ace Hardlight card with a rare misprint. The Ace Hardlight - whose weakness read as 'tire' - was encased in a plastic sheet and was safe from dust, fingerprints, and space battle damage. "They go for hundreds now but thankfully I got this bad boy in a random pull!" he explained as Elaris held it.  
  
  
  


Cassiopeia or Courtney would've feigned interest in the little card with the rather mundane typo adorning its surface. Elaris, who had once hunted on spaceBay for rare variants to fill out her own geeky collections, had an impressed expression on her face that was honest and legitimately shocked. The best she had were first editions!

What then followed was a solid hour of intense card battling, the kind often only beheld in official tournaments (which Dr. Nefarious always wanted to go to but never could, for obvious crime-related reasons). The first match ended rather quickly with Dr. Nefarious soundly trouncing her team before she could set up a proper counterattack, but Elaris was a fast learner and had also played this game back in college, so gradually the mechanic was able to fight back his chosen cards. She still wasn't able to win, but she was at least able to faint a couple of Dr. Nefarious's monsters before he swept her entire team.

There was a brief pause between matches as Elaris ate a sandwich for late lunch - with her card game partner reminiscing on eating sandwiches in the past as she did so - and then they kept going. Laughter filled the air as Reactors beat Eviscerators, as Shellshock destroyed Shellshock, until at last they stopped when Elaris finally won her first match (although Elaris had a sneaky suspicion that he swallowed his pride and let her win) and they were just hanging out and talking, their elbows both resting on the playmat as they collected the cards in a heap.

"You know, you should try fighting your enemies with Exterminator rather than physically. It'd probably be less hazardous to your health and you wouldn't need so many repairs." Elaris offered with a friendly smile.

Dr. Nefarious, twirling a Gleeman Vox card idly between two of his talons, looked skyward as he considered this option.

"Knowing the Lombax, he'd find a way to make these cards lethal." he retorted back.

Elaris, from what little she knew of Ratchet, couldn't argue with that.

* * *

After the card game was put away and the crates were shoved back in their places against the walls, with a brief pause as Nefarious showed her more rare additions to his collection followed by a _second_ brief pause as Elaris showed off some Amiibo she had to bid-snipe on because they were store exclusives and being scalped by online vendors, it was Elaris's turn to offer up a friendly activity. And her suggestion surprised both robots.

"I want Dr. Nefarious to stand still and let me draw him," Elaris said, pulling out a heavy sketchbook and a charcoal stick from one of her work tables. First, she pulled out an adjustable lamp and turned it on, adjusting the beam so it gave her a desired light source. Then, she pulled up a chair, one that was more comfortable and had better lumbar support than the crates.

Finally, she gently pushed Dr. Nefarious in the best spot under the lighting, coaxed his arms in an outstretched position with his claws in the perfect pose, carefully pulled his wings out of the slots in his back, and sat down in the chair. The killer robot watched her intently while rooted to the spot, almost afraid to speak. He almost looked like a movie prop for an action film that used a freeze ray as a murder weapon.

"Relax, Nef." He physically relaxed at her words as if on cue, his metal nerves settling into a more comfortable stance. "While I do have virtual blueprints, I also want to draw you so I have some visual cues that will help with future repairs. You know, just in case you blow up again!" she said in as casual of a tone as she could manage.

Dr. Nefarious cracked yet another genuine smile, the latest in many since he came here. They were becoming more frequent and Elaris had the wistful hope that this meant he'd be a less grumpy person in the news reports.

"Are you worried about me?"

Elaris smiled back. ' _He didn't know the half of it._ ' she thought to herself.

"I'm offering an option in the future so you don't have to worry about anymore black market deals or potentially falling into a trap set by the Galactic Rangers and getting thrown in a prison cell with only one arm and a broken internal battery. Just give me more of a head's up than last time and I can piece you back together without asking any questions." she said in her most pleasant customer service tone she could muster.

That explanation was good enough for Dr. Nefarious and he accepted the offer that she was graciously extending to him. At first, he tried to maintain the same dignified air of a museum statue - complete with his jaw set firmly in place like he was examining a civil war - as he remained silent while Elaris sketched him.

He would oblige if Elaris told him to move closer, to move farther, to spin around, to flare out his wings (she was particularly interested in his wings since they weren't a body part he had before his transformation), and even to make a certain pose like he was posed to attack. But after a while the silence got overbearing and Elaris told him that he was free to talk if he wanted to.

"I never knew you were an artist, Elaris!" came the first words out of his mouth after they started the art session, tumbling unheeded with the same boundless energy as a puppy and betraying his real thoughts.

"It's only a hobby..." came the same reply, in a tiny voice that spoke volumes about how she wasn't able to get quite enough reblogs or hearts on various social media sites to really justify calling herself an "artist" over a mechanic. And, while Lawrence wasn't a part of the conversation, he would know about her doodles, considered how they were strewn all about the workplace on little post-it notes like a bad case of chicken pox.

"I was gonna ask if you could draw me but you're already doing that! Hahahaha..." Dr. Nefarious said at a lame attempt at artist's humor. He couldn't even draw a stick figure.

 _Maybe_ if he dipped his claws in some finger paints and someone gave him a blank canvas, he could create something that the artist community would call ' _avant garde_ ' and a ' _social-political commentary'_ , but he didn't feel like getting dried paint chips stuck in his hand joints.

Then he slumped as something started to burn in his mind and his mood faltered.

"Elaris..." he started, letting his arms sag.

Elaris looked up and locked eyes with him.

He took a deep breath and exhaled, a gesture that was useless on a robot but still cleared his thoughts. "This was a long time ago but...I'm sorry for the way I acted on the day that you left for Bogon."

Both of them paused and studied each other. Neither of them said a word as their thoughts turned inward. The day Elaris left for college. The last time they were together. The defining moment that set one on a path of modest if rather _unimportant_ success and the other on the path of the supervillain. That fateful day that probably helped to create one of the universe's most hated enemies.

But it also dawned on her that he was genuinely apologizing out of the bottom of his cold, metallic heart, and that warmed her softer, more fleshy heart.

"It's fine, Nef! I'm not mad at you for what happened!" she explained at last, as she sketched him as a brooding gargoyle on the side of a more professional live study. She made a mental note to get some red charcoal pencils to properly color in his eyes as she studied his worried face. "A lot of...bad things have happened since then, but you can't change the past!"

"Yeah..." Nefarious snorted with the wounded air of someone who knew the perils of time travel _all too well_. "I know..."

The bitter undertones of his words revealed something hidden that Elaris immediately noticed, a tiny clue that most detectives would miss. She paused in mid-line, her charcoal stick hanging above the paper, as she put the pieces together in her head.

"...wait. Were you...going to fix that day with the Great Clock?" Elaris asked incredulously.

There was a brief embarrassed silence, the silence of a child with their hand caught in the cookie jar, before he fessed up.

"It was only one of many possible things to change, just one of the many failures that I was going to rewind and fix in my new timeline, but...yes." Dr. Nefarious admitted, shoulders sagging even more until his hands nearly grazed the floor.

Despite the threat of total annihilation and being wiped from existence almost happening a week ago hanging in her mind, Elaris found herself laughing.

"Awww! You nearly destroyed the universe for me! That's so _sweet_!" she teased.

Meanwhile, Nefarious was mentally applauding the fact that he couldn't blush anymore as he dragged a weary hand across his face.

* * *

The hours flew by and night descended upon Elaris's small corner of Kalebo III. She doodled some more, showing Dr. Nefarious her sketches from time to time and letting him make creative suggestions like "draw a blood splatter" or "give me yell lines". She drew Lawrence, because Nefarious wanted to see her art progress and because Elaris thought that even her doodles needed a doodle butler before they _felt_ right. She even attempted to draw Captain Qwark from memory at the suggestion of her new art partner and failed miserably at it, but they both got a good laugh at the hideous facsimile of the musclebound superhero.

Then, once Elaris put the sketchbook away, they _talked_.

At first, they talked about that day in college when Elaris transferred to the Bogon Galaxy to finish her degree. It was clearly a wound that still existed in their minds and needed healing. There were regrets and tears were shed from both parties (even if Nefarious's were metaphorical noises since his tear ducts no longer existed) as they both vented to each other and then told each other that it was okay and that there was no actual hard feelings. It hurt but their souls needed it.

Then they talked about other, happier subjects. She let Dr. Nefarious talk about Lance and Janice for a while and, while Elaris never watched a single episode of the show and honestly didn't see the wide-scale appeal that it had, she loved how passionate he sounded while talking about the thing that literally invaded his mind earlier that day.

Then he asked her what shows she liked to watch and she admitted that she cancelled her Spaceflix account months ago because she just didn't have the time to get into new shows anymore, but then that lead into her explaining the lore of the game series she was playing, a game that she frequently streamed and involved a lot of plot twists and demons and guns.

By the time she started to explain that the _fifth_ mainline game in the series was actually a reboot of the _second_ game but was still necessary to play in order to know the true identity of a character that was linked to the third protagonist introduced in the plot, Lawrence walked up to them and announced it was getting late.

Some people would've seen this as a wasted day where no actual repairs got done and that she was foolish to give the authorities an extra day to break down the door to her shop, but Elaris felt like the stress was lifted from her shoulders. She really was working herself to the bone trying to meet a deadline and although this day wasn't the _smartest_ decision in the world while she was continuing to break the law housing these two under her roof, it made her _feel_ better.

And she could tell that her robot patient felt better. Elaris was smart enough to know that a couple days wasn't enough to pull all the weeds out of Dr. Nefarious's proverbial mental health garden, but it was a _start_. He certainly looked happier than he ever did in the newspaper printouts.

Call her foolishly optimistic, but Elaris had _hope_ in Dr. Nefarious. It was tiny and cautious, a small flicker of light facing the yawning abyss that was the evil consuming his soul, but it was there.

"From the looks of your readings, you really need only one more rest before your battery's back at full capacity. You'll be running more smoothly than you were before!" she said as Dr. Nefarious climbed back up on the operating table like it was the world's most comfortable bed.

"Excellent..." he replied, leaving it at that. For the sake of Elaris's sanity, he wasn't going to burst into any villainous cackles until _after_ he was off this planet.

"Thank you for this day off." Elaris said again, giving Dr. Nefarious another quick hug. He graciously accepted it without another word.

"Tomorrow!" she declared, pointing a finger into the air. She then leveled it at his face.

"-I'm painting you purple."

* * *

End of Chapter 4.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Ace Hardlight card that Dr. Nefarious owns is an actual collectible in Ratchet: Deadlocked and yes, the collectible also says that Ace Hardlight's weakness is "tire". Sorry, I use this fanfic as an excuse to bring up obscure Ratchet and Clank facts because it's really funny imagining Dr. Nefarious to be someone who would utterly demolish you in a physical trading card game.
> 
> "Telequipping" is, of course, the way that they explain how Ratchet can summon an arsenal of giant weapons out of nowhere in the 2016 movie/game. I like to think that there's a more mundane application of this and Dr. Nefarious has a personal hammerspace that he uses to store his rare nerdy collectibles to keep them out of harm's way. He's had so many villain lairs blow up that he'd rather not take any chances. 
> 
> As for Elaris being an artist, I like to think that both the 2016 movie and game show that Elaris actually has an artistic talent. The same wall that has Dr. Nefarious's nerd poster also has a lot of cute and well-drawn doodles of Protopets and Zoni, and there was a cutscene late in the game that implied that Elaris drew it and she draws really well! Too bad she has only 100 followers each on Spacetagram and Space Tumblr.


	5. One Good Deed

Chapter 5

* * *

"Wake-y wake-y, sleepy head!"

When Elaris flicked on his power supply and brought him back to life, he stretched like a cat and gave out a deep yawn, testing his new battery strength. As his inner mechanisms gently purred to life - and at a better efficiency than they had in years, no less! - he was happy to see Elaris in a bright mood. Behind her, he noticed several towers of paint cans, all marked with names like "Byzantium" and "Mysterious Sangria".

Oh, _right!_ He forgot that he asked her for a new coat of paint a while back. He stretched his arms behind his head, loosening muscles that no longer existed in a old squishy habit. He was getting tired of being blue anyway. What's the point of having a robot body if you never customized it every so often?

' _Maybe I should ask her for some flame patterns!_ ' he mused like a teenager at a tattoo parlor.

Then his smile faded when his red optics flicked from the paint cans to the commercial belt sander that was sitting next to several piles of used sandpaper. Tiny flakes of blue paint still dotted the sandpaper like snowflakes. A trash can near the crime scene was filled with a suspiciously blue pile of dust.

Too numb to look at himself as his brain let the pieces fall into place, Dr. Nefarious let his hands gently graze one of his arms. It was smooth to the touch. _Too_ smooth to the touch.

"Lawrence and I sanded you down while you were asleep!" Elaris answered as Dr. Nefarious finally looked down and shrieked at his naked, silver appearance.

"You tend to wiggle a lot when you're awake-" she kept explaining, as if unaware at the sudden panic in the robot in front of her. His talons frantically scrambled to cover areas that he never hid with clothes. His Barbie doll anatomy disappeared behind embarrassed hands. "-and I also took the time to sort through some colors you might like!"

" _AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!_ " was his response.

* * *

After a harrowing five minutes spent calming down a mechanical supervillain and explaining to him that he's basically been naked for years, a humiliating experience that had to be interrupted by Lawrence once the topic started accidentally turning risqué, a now calmer but still slightly mortified Dr. Nefarious was sitting on the operating table - legs crossed, back bent, and balled fist resting underneath his chin - as Elaris held up each individual paint can in front of his smoothed down, baby-fresh face.

At first, he gently tuned her out as she shared her knowledge of all the different shades of purple and their meanings, her cheeks still a little flush as she too tried to put the previous conversation behind her so she can never speak of it again. He wanted this process to go by quicker so he could tell her even more about how he felt and then finally (and this thought oddly _pained_ him) leave Kalebo III.

That changed when Elaris told him that purple was also the color of _death_ in some cultures. Then, miraculously, the world of color instantly became a fascinating thing for him. Soon the topic changed from picking a color for his body to what color would make him the most deadly. Then the topic shifted into additional details. Maybe Elaris was patient enough to paint some stripes on him, he mused out loud as his wild imagination got the better of him. After that, the flame patterns were brought up, then gravestones, and then soon he wanted a whole constellation painted on him while Elaris gave him the tired smile of an artist trying to rein in an overly excited commissioner.

Lawrence, being more sensible and knowing an impeding disaster when he saw one, chose three shades of purple and a lighter shade of blue for Dr. Nefarious. Elaris and her future canvas were both taken back by the choices at first but then, after examining the colors, decided it was the right choice. The butler had a great eye for color. Kinda hard _not_ to when you were programmed to be an impeccable interior decorator.

"If you don't mind, ma'am - and _sir_ -" he said pointedly at the silver robot that still wanted fake blood splatters painted on his head, "-but we should probably get this done as quickly as possible. We've been here for a week straight and we can't stay here forever."

Those words hung in the air and had a painful physical presence. Both Elaris and Dr. Nefarious sagged simultaneously under the implication. For a moment, neither of them would meet each other's eyes.

"Oh...yes if you say so." Elaris answered finally.

* * *

Some time had passed and Nefarious looked like a completely different robot.

He stood proudly in a nearby mirror admiring the splendid new paint job, shifting between poses as he appreciated Elaris's thorough handiwork. The robot pivoted on his heels, admiring every angle as the light danced on his shiny, purple finish. His brain, remembering the sensation of olfaction, conjured up the memory of 'New Car' smell in his head as he preened. Elaris really did know her stuff, Nefarious thought to himself as he flared out his wings and posed like he was moments away from tearing Captain Qwark's eyes out with his bare hands.

' _No, too messy_ ,' Dr. Nefarious corrected himself, banishing that delightful daydream from his head. ' _Note to self: Think of a way to eliminate my enemies from a safe distance so as to not ruin Ellie's hard work_.'

She had even designed a little skull pattern on his chest light like he requested! It was the compromise they reached, when flame patterns and star decals were denied. He tapped it gently with a sharp fingertip as he stared in the mirror. Turning into a robot gave him a brand new appreciation for skull imagery, now that his face looked like one.

He swiveled his head to look at Elaris, dumb grin plastered on his face. The mood shifted when she seemed sad from the quick glance he gave her. Then his own smile faltered when he remembered the one thing he was going to tell her. With one final glance at the mirror, he rushed over to her and offered to help clean up the mess he left behind.

"Look Elaris, I wanted to thank you for all that you've done!" he started, hands full of paint cans and pacing beside her like he did back in high school when they were rushing in-between classes. Lawrence hung off to the side, book in hand, and let them clean, recognizing a bonding session when he saw one.

"It was no big deal really! I was just happy to spend some time with an old friend!" Elaris responded as she chucked the empty paint cans into a recycling bin.

She paused, looking skyward as if deep in thought. "...even though my old friend is on the run from galactic authorities."

" _Inter_ galactic authorities!" he corrected, sounding pleased with himself.

As they swept, organized, and threw garbage away, they chattered happily together, each of them basking in the other's company. The talk was light, traveling over various nerdy topics as obscure in-jokes were shared. However, despite the brevity, there was also a sadness hanging in the air between them as they cleaned. Now that Dr. Nefarious had a fresh coat of paint, the repairs were officially _over_. He was free to walk out of this workshop and go commit more grand crimes against the universe.

So why wasn't he excited about leaving?

Dr. Nefarious's hand lightly brushed the scar etched across his face, where it was now sealed with an invisible alloy to keep dust particles and other things from entering his brain and disturbing the delicate parts within. She really went above and beyond any previous repair job he's gotten over the years.

Once the workplace was freed of paint accessories and garbage, he walked back to the operating table that he laid on for what felt like weeks, climbed back on top of it, adjusted the height so it was more like a very large chair, sat down, and motioned her to sit beside him.

Elaris sat next to him on top of that same operating table, unsure at first, but then, with slow, thoughtful movements, she locked one of her arms around his and rested her head against his chest. Neither of them spoke for a good, long moment as they basked in each other's company. Faintly, she could hear the deep thrumming hum of different operating systems buried deep within his hull, all mimicking the sound of an organic heartbeat.

"You don't have to leave so soon..." Elaris felt herself saying in a tiny, pained little voice. "You can hide away here. I can think of something..."

She trailed off hopelessly. Above her head, she heard the supervillain suck in a breath through his teeth. He was working better than he had in years and yet he also felt a deep ache spread through his chest and behind his eyes, an unstoppable phantom limb pain. That was one of the downsides of transforming into a robot; your brain still remembered the sensation of tears even though all of his lacrimal glands and tear ducts were gone.

"You know that will only get you into trouble, right Elaris." he said, choking up a little despite the physical impossibility.

She squeezed his hand tightly, interlocking her delicate squishy fingers with his sharp, dagger-like talons. He looked down at her with a hint of confusion. She exhaled, staring off at a distant wall across the workshop.

"I know, but I...I just got you back..."

He flinched as if Elaris had struck him with something physical. The supervillain, someone who could give impromptu speeches to a whole galaxy of subjugated squishies, was at a complete loss for words.

"Y-You..." was all he could manage.

Elaris looked up at the criminal, the monster that she helped during this whirlwind of a week, and she couldn't help but laugh at his dumbfounded face. Sitting up, she took her free hand and placed it on his face. Oh my gosh, she _knew_.

"I'm just...sorry for not saying goodbye all those years ago." she started as both of their gazes met. "I thought that, y'know, you hated me after I left and so I never tried to contact you. But then, by some galactic miracle, you end up in my life again, only this time you came back in tiny robotic pieces."

He grabbed the hand that rested on his face, and squeezed it tightly.

"I'm sorry for acting the way I did. I didn't want to lose you and be left alone with Qwark. It was selfish of me, it really was. Do you still have it in you to forgive an idiot like me?"

She smirked at his remark, nodding in agreement. She knew why he wouldn't tell anyone about her or who she was to his circle of "friends", but she also wanted him to say it himself. She was about to open her mouth but Nefarious already knew what she was about to ask. He reached out and grabbed her face, cupping her chin with both of his hands.

"The reason I never told Lawrence - or anyone else for that matter - about you was to _protect_ you. I've hired some henchmen that would have gladly harmed you to get back at me. The Defense Force would keep all eyes and tabs on you too if we communicated back and forth. I didn't want you to get _used_."

He smiled weakly, even though he still felt like bawling his eyes out in front of his childhood friend. His voice was beginning to break.

"Plus, I know you Elaris! You got upset after accidentally killing a spider in your dorm! Dragging you into my mess of a life would have been a terrible mistake!"

"But it had a family!" she answered back in a mocking tone and it made Nefarious laugh, weakening the tension that hung between them. He loosened his grip from her face, but the moment he did so, she wrapped both of her arms around his body. Neither wanted to let the other go.

They both sat there in silence, taking in each other's company. It felt weird, for the both of them. Nefarious was used to all his past partners using him for gain and Elaris, well her past partner was an organic life form. One that had a relatively normal life and probably only broke minor laws like speed limits and when to take a U-turn.

She could offer him a job on Kalebo III, she considered, as she felt one of his hands gently rest on top of her head and trace circles on one of her spiral horns. He had such a brilliant mind and a knack for building weapons and machinery. She didn't want to say it out loud, but it pained her to see that talent go to waste and to go to projects that hurt other people. Wrapped up in that fantasy, of a world where Dr. Nefarious could just be accepted into her work place no questions asked, she had to remind herself that he was a wanted criminal with a bolt bounty reaching the billions for his return.

As the metaphorical gears in her head turned, a literal gear turned in Dr. Nefarious's head as he kept watching her. He really did care about her, and it _hurt_. He wanted to keep her away from any and all harm, and he knew that, to achieve this, he'd have to stay away from her.

But he couldn't just up and leave and never speak to her again! Not after what she's done for him! Maybe he could hide away for a while until the galaxy forgot about him. Let every single sin gradually fall off his shoulders. Maybe, in five - no, _ten_ \- years time, they could finally become the couple they should've been if they didn't split off on different paths. He couldn't change the past with a giant clock, but surely...

' _No,'_ he thought to himself sourly, stopping his own train of thought before it ever left the station. Being around Elaris reminded him of how nice it was to have friends - actual friends that weren't just kissing his ass to keep him from jettisoning them into space - and to joke around from time to time.

He _loved_ her.

But he was thinking the same thing she was thinking from the moment she brought him back into her life. He's a criminal. He's a ruthless villain, someone who once tore the entire universe apart on a whim. A monster. The worst thing Elaris has ever done was parking violations.

Dr. Nefarious was still contemplating his situation, strangely quiet and deep in thought even for him, as he watched Lawrence and Elaris pack up a luxury cruiser that a Kalebo CEO had left behind Elaris's workshop one day and never came back for. At least they were going to be traveling in style for the next couple of months as they fled from authorities. There was even a pair of fuzzy dice in the cruiser and some discarded mix tapes.

"You know Nef, if you ever change your mind at all, I've got room here for you and Lawrence." Elaris persisted, taking one more chance at what she knew to be a stupid idea. "I've been working on kickstarting my own company and I'd be glad to have you on board! Might take some persuading, but I could try and make something work."

"You don't have to do that! You've done enough for me as is!" Dr. Nefarious responded. It felt strange, being sensible. Elaris was rubbing off on him.

She was about to argue when Lawrence walked up to both of them, checkbook in hand.

"Now if you two are done with the unspoken confessions and tearful goodbyes, let's get down to your payment."

_Payment?_ Elaris froze. She'd completely forgotten about that. She paced around in-between the two robots, crunching fake numbers in her head as she tried to come up with a reasonable price. She was happy to do it for free but Nefarious insisted that they pay up. They did take up a week of her time and put her in great danger, after all.

"How about, say, a few billion bolts?" Lawrence said, mostly to Nefarious but in a voice loud enough for both of them to hear.

" _A FEW BILLION BOLTS?"_ her voice came out in a rush.

She chuckled as Nefarious stood up. He really thought she'd ask for _that_ much?! Her laughter was a melodious sound that was like music to the robot's ears as he scribbled down a number on a work table littered with sticky note doodles.

Then he handed her the check. Her eyes grew wide. It wasn't a joke.

"It's...for that company you always wanted to start. If you starting up that company means you stop working with Gadgetron, then you have my support."

She didn't know what to say at first. Her mouth kept opening and shutting as speaking became an impossible task. He placed a hand on her shoulder.

"This is money that I've stolen and cheated from helpless squishies and robots, money that was never mine to begin with. Do _not_ feel bad taking this money! I can't build a new space station and giant lasers with a drained bank account. You're weakening one of the most notorious criminals this universe has ever known!" he said coolly, his voice even in tone.

Elaris still stared at the check. Something clicked in her head.

"Are you...doing a good deed right now?" she asked.

It was a cliched thing to say, but it got the reaction she wanted. A tired laugh left Nefarious's mouth as his hand lifted off her shoulder. "It's not going to make up for all the horrible, evil things that I have done with my miserable existence..." But then a tiny smirk traveled across his face. "-but it's a start."

Tucking the check in one of her pockets, Elaris watched as the two robots readied to board the cruiser. She waved goodbye to both of them, with billions of bolts burning against her breast. She knew she couldn't think of a good lie to explain why she had Dr. Nefarious living in her workshop, but she did have a great lie to tell Gadgetron tomorrow, right after she told them that she was quitting.

As she imagined the look on the CEO's faces when they lost the person responsible for designing some of their best weapons, Dr. Nefarious startled her by giving her one last hug. For a moment, her feet left the ground as he squeezed her tightly and did a tiny spin in place.

"I might start calling you more so I think it's best you start answering your phone!" Dr. Nefarious said as his purple body engulfed her's. He pressed his face against hers, her nose resting against the blank area that used to have one back in college, his eyes illuminating her face with crimson.

"As long as you don't call in the middle of the night like last time!" she said back. She felt her feet touch the ground again as he loosened his grip, but only by a little bit.

"To be fair on Lawrence I was too busy being dead to check your time zone!"

She lightly punched him in the shoulder, and then made a mock "oww" noise when her fist collided with metal. He broke out into a skeletal grin.

"And while I'm at it, you should knock your evil schemes down a little! Destroying the space-time continuum is a little much! Maybe invade a planet instead of a galaxy this time, okay?" she said, shaking a finger in his face.

"How about a city?" he suggested, grin never leaving his face.

"As long as it's not Metropolis, it'll do." she said, settling for that.

He chuckled while still having her in his embrace. Her warmth - her organic warmth - spread through his limbs. He was going to cherish this soft, squishy sensation forever, no matter how hypocritical it made him. "I'm not sure how long I can keep that promise but I'll keep it in mind!"

They let go - finally breaking contact and allowing the other to leave - and before he boarded, he heard her say "Wait, I forgot something!" He stopped in the doorway of the ship, leaned down until his face was level with her's, and was about to ask her what she meant when she gave him a tiny kiss, leaving a lipstick mark on his metallic face.

"Watch yourself, cowboy."

* * *

"Is there _ANY_ reception on this miserable _planet?!_ "

Ratchet, Clank, and Qwark could only watch in mutual pity (and, in Ratchet's case, mild amusement) as Dr. Nefarious kept his eyes glued on his cracked, long-suffering gPhone clutched in one hand, the other hand resting angrily against his hip. The supervillain kept watching the symbol in the upper left corner, his impatient foot tapping against the rocky terrain underneath him. He was certain that it had gained a bar just now!

"Hey Nefarious! Who are you calling?" came a hated voice as a shadow quickly engulfed Dr. Nefarious. The robot gritted his teeth and growled as Captain Qwark - now an important government figure with a fancy office and defense forces at his fingertips - was suddenly standing behind him, his massive frame looming behind him like an impenetrable wall of muscle and meat. He stalked away from his hated enemy, bristling with rage.

"IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, _QWARK!_ " Nefarious yelled, not even turning around to look at the stupid lug. To look at him was to give him more attention than he deserved! Still clutching the phone, he rapidly skittered on top of a giant boulder like a giant, metallic spider. The other three members of his party clustered around the rock as he stood above them, still watching the phone.

He practically jumped for joy when he saw his phone pick up a weak signal. He pulled up his phone contacts with a hand quivering with excitement and selected Elaris's name, which was now adorned with even more purple heart emojis since last time.

"Hello?" came a familiar voice on the other line.

Dr. Nefarious's voice caught in his throat and came out of his voice box in a little squeak as so many emotions clouded his circuits at once. As he pressed the phone to his ear, he was thankful he couldn't cry any tears and embarrass himself in front of the two squishies and the talking backpack.

" _ELLIE!_ Ellie, it's me! Nef!" he screamed as what little dignity he had shriveled up and died at his feet. He was almost _disgusted_ by how sickeningly happy he sounded.

"Nefarious?" asked a very concerned Elaris.

"Ellie, you gotta help me! I've been kidnapped by an army of robots - not _mine_ , some other moron - and I've been betrayed by Lawrence so now I'm stranded on some distant planet with Ratchet, Clank, and _Qwark_! I've been hiking in the wilderness for _days!_ " He dragged a hand against his face as his voice took on a pleading, pathetic tone. " _Please!_ I'm losing my mind here!"

He heard a tiny "Bit late for that..." from Ratchet underneath him. The Lombax's commentary was ignored.

What he heard next wiped the maniacal grin off of his face. Elaris - love of his life, savior to supervillains the world over - came back over the phone but her voice was crackling as the signal started to die.

"Nefarious...kssh...hear...sssht...king up..."

Nefarious's heart plummeted to his feet and his optics shrank into little red pinpricks in his eye sockets. "WHAT!? OH NO, NOT _NOW!"_ Nefarious yelled. Desperation consumed him as he screeched at the phone as if hoping to pierce through the static.

"ELLIE! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE WITH _THEM!"_ he yelled, but it was too late. The call was dropped as his only connection to the outside galaxy died in front of him. His one chance at salvation slipped through his fingertips.

Without another word, he sadly climbed down the boulder and sank to his knees, hiding his face in both hands as he made melodramatic sobbing noises into his palms. As he sobbed to the best of his ability, his gPhone started playing the Lance and Janice theme song in an 8-bit chiptune, mocking him. Ratchet and Clank both exchanged glances, at a complete loss for words.

His Shakespearean melancholy didn't last.

"So." Qwark said, swiftly pulling Dr. Nefarious into a one-armed embrace and lifting him off the ground. The robot's legs dangled limply and the robot quietly wished for his arch-nemesis to suffer a heart attack right then and there as Captain Qwark jabbed a sausage-like finger right into Nefarious's glass dome head. "Who's Ellie?"

* * *

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I want to once again thank @Dimensionheist on Twitter for helping to write this thing! She wrote the first draft, I finished it up and added some scenes. 
> 
> And yes, as you probably caught on, that's my excuse as to why Dr. Nefarious is just riding around on a simple little hovercruiser and shouting at the heroes with a megaphone at the beginning of All 4 One. That's because he did a charitable deed for his girlfriend and then proceeded to perform a very frugal act of supervillainy that immediately backfired on him. Give him a break, he's operating on a budget here.


End file.
